A Reader Writes: Where Should I Shop?

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clothing-girlsDear Editor,

I have a problem. I go to Jewish stores to buy clothes and I find that so much of what is being offered is simply not for a bas Yisroel. And if someone wants to find something that is not slinky or not so trendy, it is like finding a needle in a haystack. And to compound it all, the salesladies are not representing the highest levels of tznius, so they purposely or unwittingly encourage women and especially girls to purchase clothes which they should not be wearing.

In addition to this, a lot of these stores have cramped dressing room areas, pushy sales-help, exorbitant prices and very few amenities. As a result, I would much rather a very relaxing trip to the mall or shop online. Some department stores have nice coffee lounges, nice décor, and appealing service. And the prices are still better than the outrageous prices in the frum stores, and shockingly, like in the Gap and Old Navy, I’ll often find clothes that are more appropriate than what I am being offered in a Jewish-owned store. True, overall, the atmosphere and the ads and photos in these department stores reflect the radically immodest world we live in, but again, I can purchase what suits me in a pleasant atmosphere.

Why can’t we have good frum stores whose clothing won’t embarrass me and whose prices won’t make me go broke? Why can’t we have fashionable, tasteful, tzniusdike outfits for today’s frum women, sold by nice, modest saleswoman who understanding what we should and should not be wearing? Why do I have to be embarrassed by the people running these stores?

A Bas Yisroel


24 COMMENTS

  1. I would start making my own clothes. And if you are successfull, you might meet a huge demand of ladies who are as tznius-minded as yourself.

    Don’t blame the stores, take action!

  2. I think Bas Yisroel should work on her self confidence. If she would be more self confident she would not care what the saleslady says or wears.

  3. Grow up and learn to stop making issues over everything! Obviously there are stores that sell the tznius cloth you like cuz thousands of our bas yisroel are prove.stop always finding negative look in a mirror and improve your “mental tznius”

  4. As a father of three teenage girls, I could not agree more!
    when my wife goes shopping with my daughters, i cry when they come home!
    if you have a daughter starting shidduchim, FORGET it! Shabbos dress for $300-$400. A bochur gets one or two suits. a girl needs OUTFITS!!
    they cost so much BECAUSE YOU WANT TO PAY A LOT.
    if the same outfit was $50, the girls and mothers say, “oh it’s a piece of junk”. but if they charge you $250, then it’s HAUTE COUTURE!

  5. Used to be, you’d go to the east coast for metzios. There are no metzios anymore. Do people take pride in spending more for less?
    Personally, most of my clothes are from the thrift shop. Easier if you live out of town.

  6. i think many of you missed the boat. This woman is right! if you go to some of these stores you can’t ask the saleswoman if something looks modest if she is dressed like inappropriate…or the like! This is no joke! Many of the saleswomen are dressing (like the teenagers, long slinky skirts, shirts that are immodest ) yes-stores have to sell their product but can’t we eliminate the priducts that are not befitting a bas yisroel? and definitely DO NOT dress that way just because you want to “sell your product”.

  7. I live out of town and what a lot of the girls here do is go to Lord & Taylor, and similar stores (Marshall’s, Loehman’s, Fox’s are great too) and you can always wait until the items go on sale.
    Then take the dress to the dressmaker to add a little extra fabric for the length. If the neck is low, wear a shell underneath.
    There is a new book on the market about tznius and it discusses how to make clothes more tznius- how to alter them.
    Plenty of frum stores have good prices too, especially if you don’t mind waiting until the season is partially through or if you’re buying last year’s style.
    Outlet stores do well too. My children love the Ralph Lauren outlet stores where you spend about $15-$30 a shirt (same or cheaper than a frum brand) and you feel like a millionaire with the logo on the shirt.:-)

    On the other hand we should give parnossah to the frum shops too. Don’t only shop at the goyish stores! We owe the frum stores our business, as long as they are affordable!
    There are plenty of frum stores where the store owners are dressing tznius.

  8. May Hashem bless the writer for identifying a big problem.

    If the frum stores are not acting as they should, feel free to go elsewhere. You are not obligated to ‘buy frum’ at all costs, spiritual and monetary. We are not a captive market. Ask any good Rav and he will confirm that the mitzvoh to buy from a frum person has limits and is not meant to lead to abuse, ripoffs, being taken for a ride, and other violations of halocho.

    Chazak ve’ematz!

  9. May I applaud such people who keep kedushas bas yisroel,and want and expect a standard of tznius,if enough people ask for these tznius clothes they will stock more-keep asking for it HABO LETAHER MAYASMIM OSO!If a person is strong in Yiras Shomayim he/she will insist on not going after the crowds,but will want to eat,wear,act according to the will of G-D !
    This Nisoyon is not only in clothes but food too-some hechserim are not for me,I dont buy-yes its tempting at times but I know my standard,and B’H I would like me,my family to live up to it.

  10. The writer is a 100% right- my wife cant stand most of the in-town stores and buys somtimes from Chasidishe stores but mainly from outlet malls.

  11. Anon-
    It’s interesting to note that out of an entire web site you find the one outfit that was $90 and ignore all the other great clothes…
    Seems to me that your issue isn’t tznius- your just hiding behind it.

  12. Are you saying that Mrs. K or even S&W clothing isnt Tzniusdik enough? Their prices arent that high either. Also, how about Chadwick’s (online) where clothing is very reasonable and there are many Tzniusdike styles, and definitely reasonable! They also tell you the length of most skirts.

    There are plenty of places.

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