Rebbetzin Ruchoma Shain a”h


candle-small6[Levaya info below.] It is with great sadness that we report the passing of Rebbetzin Ruchoma Shain a”h, daughter of Rav Yaakov Yosef Herman zt”l and well-known author of “All for the Boss,” the groundbreaking, bestselling book about her father and her life. She was 98.

Rebbetzin Shain had been staying at Leisure Chateau in Lakewood, NJ, but was rushed to Kimball Medical Center last night and passed away.

Rebbetzin Shain was a remarkable woman who stood at the side of her husband, Rav Moshe Shain, for decades as a true eizer kenegdo, allowing her husband to immerse himself in Torah.

As the youngest daughter of Rav Yaakov Yosef Herman, Rebbetzin Shain, from a young age, was imbued with strong hashkafos and chashivus for Torah and lomdei Torah. She grew up in a home that was literally open to all Yidden who needed a warm meal, a comfortable bed, or a listening ear. These ideals stayed with her for her entire life, as she continued the legacy of her unforgettable father by continuing in his path of Torah and gemillus chassodim.

Rebbetzin Shain, following her marriage, spent time in Europe, when her husband learned at the Mir Yeshiva in Poland, where she was together with her sister, Rebbetzin Sheinberg, and her brother, Rav Nochum Dovid.

She later moved to the United States and then Eretz Yisroel. For over a decade, she lived with her son, Rav Yitzchok Shain, R”M at Adelphia Yeshiva, in Adelphia, NJ.

Four years ago, Rebbetzin’s Shain’s sister, Rebbetzin Bessie Sxcheinberg a”h, wife of Rav Chaim Pinchos Scheinberg, rosh yeshiva of Yeshiva Torah Ore, passed away.

Rebbetzin Shain, besides being a bestselling author, spent many years as a devoted mechaneches, and was beloved by her students. She authored a number of books, including Dearest Children, Reaching the Stars, All for the Best, and Shining Lights – Illuminating Stories of Faith and Inspiration, but the book that changed the lives of thousands of people was All for the Boss about her father, first published by Feldheim in 1984.

A native of Slutsk, Russia, Rebbetzin’s Shain’s father immigrated with his parents and younger sister to New York City at the age of 8 and was left on his own five years later after his family returned to Russia. Following his marriage,Rav became known for feeding and lodging dozens of people in his home, including visiting European gedolim seeking kosher meals. He displayed a staunch commitment to mitzvah observance at a time that many abandoned their faith, and urged promising young Jewish men to pursue advanced limud haTorah in the great yeshivos of Europe

For his promulgation of Torah values to Yidden, Rav Herman was called the “Chofetz Chaim of America” by Rav Boruch Ber Leibowitz, the Kaminetzer rosh yeshiva, who lived with the Hermans for two years while he was fundraising in the United States.

Rav Herman was the eldest child of Rav Yitzchok Isaac Herman and his wife, Minna Rivka. Finding it difficult to earn a living in Russia and believing that it would be easier to do so in America, his father emigrated with his wife, son, and daughter Molly in 1888. But in New York City, he was unable to find work as a private rebbi and could not keep other jobs because he refused to work on Shabbos. Five years later, he decided to return to Russia. He did not have enough travel fare for all the members of the family, so Yaakov Yosef, at age 13, was left behind with cousins until money could be saved for his fare.

Yaakov Yosef earned $1.25 a week working as a handy-boy in a Shabbos-observant fur shop in New York City. His cousins charged him $1 a week for room and board. A few weeks later, they raised his rent to $1.25. Feeling betrayed, he spent Shabbos alone in a park, where he promised himself that he would host poor and homeless people in his home after he married. After Shabbos ended, he moved to a rooming house. At work, he advanced from handy-boy to apprentice to professional worker, and four years later he was able to send money for his parents, sister, and newborn brother to join him. He was able to support his family in New York City on his salary, enabling his father to work as a rebbi.

At age 21, Rav Herman met his future wife, Aidel, daughter of Rav Shmuel Yitzchok Andron. At first Rav Herman’s mother nixed the match, since Aidel’s father could not afford a dowry. A few months later, Rav Herman bumped into Aidel’s brother Yankel Leib, who asked why he had ended the shidduch. Rav Herman explained his mother’s demand and Yankel Leib suggested that Rav Herman give him $2,000, which he would present to Rav Herman as the “dowry” on the night of the engagement. The shidduch was concluded successfully, and the couple was married on December 29, 1903. They had four daughters and one son. Rebbetzin Shain, as mentioned, was the youngest.

Rav Herman told his kallah that he wished to have an open house in which guests would be welcome for Shabbos and Yom Tov, and she agreed. Thus began their “business” of hachnasos orchim. Dozens dined at the Herman table each week, including men with social and emotional disabilities whom no one else wanted as guests. Many great rabbonim from Europe stayed with the Hermans while visiting the United States. Noteworthy among them were Rav Boruch Ber Leibowitz, rosh yeshivas Kaminetz, and his son-in-law, Rav Reuven Grozovsky, who stayed with the Hermans for two years; Rav Eliezer Yehuda Finkel, Mir rosh yeshiva; Rav Avraham Kalmanowitz; and Rav Eliyahu Eliezer Dessler. The latter wrote to his father, Rav Reuven Dov Dessler, about his host during the summer of 1930: “He is a businessman brought up in America. But he is an outstanding yirei Shamayim who observes the mitzvos of the Torah meticulously. He influences many people and guides them to become observant Jews. Reb Yaakov Yosef is known for strict adherence to the mitzvah of hachnasos orchim. On Shabbos, there are approximately twenty guests at his table.”

Rav Herman lost his wholesale fur business and most of his savings in the 1929 stock market crash. Yet he continued to provide meals and lodging for many guests in his home.

Rav Herman made aliyah to Eretz Yisroel in August 1939. Following the passing of his wife Aidel in 1946, Rav Herman remarried. Rav Herman was nfitar on July 24, 1967 at the age of 87.

The passing of his daughter, Rebbetzin Ruchomah, marks the end of an era. She will be forever remembered for her warm and loving nature, but, perhaps most of all, for influencing and uplifting the great Torah world through her writings in a manner virtually unrivaled in the world of contemporary Jewish publishing.

The levaya will be held tomorrow. Details will be posted shortly.

Yehi zichrah boruch.

Update: The levaya will take place at 11 a.m. at Tiferes Bais Yaakov, located at 613 Oak Street in Lakewood, NJ.

{Noam Newscenter}


  1. Baruch Dayin Emes. Rabbi Shain,son of Rebbetzin Shain is the 9th grade rebbi in the Mir, always told us amazing stories about his mother, and these stories inspired me very much.

  2. “The Tzaddik’s Dream”

    I just heard on a hotline from Rebbetzin Kalminovitch an outstanding Dream that a big Tzaddik had this year. A Rav & Posek from Boro Park N.Y. had a dream about the Gedolei Yisroel who are already in Shomayim who were Niftar this year.l”a

    The Gedolei Yisroel were by the Beis Dein Shel Ma’ala and were begging Hashem Yisborach to look at how much “we” the Yidden have worked on ourselves, and how much we as Klal Yisroel have grown this year. They were saying to Hashem, please Look how many Yidden got rid of the Tumah in their homes, and how much we really want to be connected to Hashem and looking forward to the Geula.

    They were begging and begging the Eibeshter (g-d) to end this long and dark Galus to bring Moshiach fast. When… Suddenly a loud voice was heard saying: “Do Bnei Yisroel really want Hashem’s Name to be known with his full Kedusha in the world? What about how Yidden are acting, especially in Shul’s, talking during Kedusha Kaddish and Davening, not giving proper Kavod to the Shul? Do they really want it?” the Geula?

    And then the Beis Dein Shel Ma’ala decided to come up with a conclusion that this year – Taf Shin Ayin Gimmel – is a big Ais Ratzon and Moshiach is really able to come to us and Hashem really wants to bring him to us.

    There is just one condition that: Hashem will test us this year in a huge way to see if we are really ready for Moshiach, if we are doing things for the Kavod of Shamayim or for the Kavod of ourselves c”v. This year could be the end of the Golus and the year of the Geula Be’ezras Hashem.

    This Tzaddik woke up in a sweat. He was so shaken up and couldn’t believe what he had heard and seen. He was shaking from real fear. Can we imagine that this is where we are up to? Moshiach is at our doorstep and every single Yid has the power to show Hashem: that “I just want to do Mitzvos for your Kovod to bring Kavod to Your Name, Hashem” and then we will hasten the Geula.

    Imagine the sound of the Shofar Shell Moshiach and YOU’R being there to witness this special long awaited day, for two thousand years, It’s surly beyond our imagination that we could be alive to really experience this day, first hand, Greet Moshiach and see it all with our own eyes. Rebbetzin Kalminovitch said that when such a strong rain falls, it is a sign That Hashem Yisborach wants us to change, so that we can be Zoche to realize that the Geula is ever so close.

    It’s all in your hands. Let’s wake up and see: “How can I do a mitzvah and do it only because I just want to bring Kavod to Hashem’s Name”? Let’s all take this lesson to heart and realize that we really must wake up and shake ourselves back into reality of how a real Yid has to conduct themselves, in order to increase the Kovod Shomayim and do a real Teshuva to bring Moshiach in Taf Shin Ayin Gimmel with the building of the third Bais Hamikdosh.

    Many of us say “I am ready for Moshiach” but we are most likely fooling our selves, we have not done much to speed up the Geula, we have been dragged into a lavish life style much to far from the life of a real and true Yid’s life style, living the their life the Torah way, we have to turn around and change all our ways and live a complete Torah life guided only by the Shulcon Aruch and our Gedolim, including the way we dress, that has gone down down down, by the laws of Tznius.

    May Hashem help us that in the Zechus of doing Teshuva by not talking in Shul especially not during Davening and improving our Tznius we should all merit to greet Moshiach.

  3. B”H

    Rebbetzin Shain’s sefer “All for the Boss” has helped me immeasurably. This Purim, I brought mishloch manos to the son of one of the talmidim that Mr. Herman sent to learn in Europe before the churban. I told him this is because of the kesher your father, ztl., had with Mr. Herman. He accepted my mishloach manis with a smile. I mentioned a few days later to a Rabbi to whom I’ve felt close the past 8 or so years that Rav Shlomo Brevda, ztl, was a machitin of Rav Sheinberg, ztl, and that the levayah was held in Yeshiva Torah Ore. He told me that his uncle was also an eidim of Mr. Herman. I asked for his uncle’s name. He said “Moshe.” I said “Shain,” and he said yes. It may be trivial to the readers but to me it was sayata dishamaya. I know so many of the myselach from “All for the Boss” that I basically feel like a part of the family. And here it turns out one of the Rabbis to whom I closely relate is a nephew of Rebbitzen Shains. He told me she was in a nursing home around Deal, N.J. but was not in communication. So I was prepared for this. Even though she was 98 years old, it is still a heartbreak. May her children and ainechlach give her and her husband, ztl, much nachas in Olom Emes.

  4. i had the zchus to meet her once on a visit to Yerusholaim,and she was a lady, a true inspiration to me and to thousands of frum women! yehi zichro boruch!

  5. truly a tragic loss for klal yisrael I got so inspired from her book “all for the boss” & ive changed in many significant ways. may her family hav a complete nechama im with u in ur sadness

  6. May her Neshima have an Aliyah. Which there is no doubt.
    She was compassionate with a great sense of humor. It was my privilege to have met her in 1991.
    I will forever cherish the All For The Boss book she autographed for me, not once but twice when I thought I lost the first one. This world has lost a truly Angel!!


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