Satire: Obama Cites Lack Of Polish Golf Courses In Skipping Auschwitz


obama-golfRiyadh, Saudi Arabia – US President Barack Obama explained his decision today not to participate in the 70th anniversary ceremonies commemorating the liberation of the Auschwitz extermination camp, noting that nowhere in the vicinity are there any golf courses that meet his exacting requirements.

World leaders gathered yesterday to mark the day when Soviet forces entered the camp in their advance on Berlin toward the end of the Second World War. There the Red Army soldiers encountered only those inmates too sickly to be included in the Germans’ death marches westward, and gradually unveiled the horrors of a place where 1.1 million people were murdered, mostly Jews. It has become a symbol of the depravity of Nazi philosophy and policies, and of international resolve not to let such atrocities recur. The seventieth is likely to be the last such event with a significant number anniversary at which survivors will still be available to attend. However, that part of Poland has little in the way of quality fairways and greens, and Obama therefore elected instead to visit the Taj Mahal after paying respects to the newly coronated despot of Saudi Arabia.

“The president recognizes the real and symbolic importance of the commemoration at Auschwitz,” said White House spokesman Josh Earnest. “But he must prioritize his attendance at different events, since many important occasions demand his attention and there is no way he can attend them all and still conduct the affairs of state. The president’s decision in no way detracts from the significance of the ceremony at Auschwitz; he simply weighed the factors and decided that, in his assessment, a junket to the Taj Mahal was the more pressing, especially given the lack of proper golf facilities anywhere near Oświęcim,” he said, referring to the Polish town whose German version of the name was given to the nearby camp.

Earnest said the president had several ideas about how the governments of Poland, Ukraine, the Baltic States, Belarus, Russian, and the Jewish organizations working to preserve the sites where Jews were massacred might adapt their activities to suit American presidential priorities. “The most obvious program involves building world-class golf courses adjacent to the locations worthy of preservation and commemoration,” he explained. “But these groups might also consider repurposing the sites themselves as golf courses.”


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  1. Why do you post this dumb garbage. Please raise the bar. You are the leading frum Jewish news website and you choose to post the trash of other fools. This article is insensitive and childish.
    Thank You for hearing me out.

  2. Is this real? From the article, I really don’t know. If it is not real, this is in poor taste. I don’t like our President either but you are taking it to another level by making fun of him an a non-truth.

    In Chazal, we see the worst non-Jewish kings and emperors were dealt with respect.

  3. Sick disgusting joke.

    On top of ONE MILLION of our family and friends who were murdered there.

    I think there should be limits to humor and this is way past any limit.

  4. Please be more selective in choosing what to print. The Jewish media must post things responsibly and this is totally irresponsible. Your constant blind criticism of the president (which I don’t necessarily disagree with) has led to your lack of discretion and propriety. Remember, this forum is not only open to our brothers. This article goes beyond being a joke.

  5. if this is a joke, it is a horrible, depraved excuse for funny, but it is sad that we have come to the point where this is very believable

  6. The president no longer is in need of votes.
    He wishes to leave his legacy on matters which his egotistical whims and fancies that he feels are relevant.

    It id rather a sad time for anything with conventional values.