Small Business Saturday Nuttiness

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small-business-saturdayBy C. Popper

There’s an upcoming Yom-tov
I must address,
It’s small business Saturday
From American Express.

When all stores will open
A second after havdalah,
So the lovers of freebees
Can make their haschalah.

You’ve got so many cards?
Is the question they ask,
If it would be me
I’d go with a mask.

It’s such a bushah
To go wait in line,
To wait for the swipes
My cards of ninety nine.

What’s wrong they ask
With making up names,
Amex knows and agrees
To our playing of games.

Is this Hashem’s will
For us to make a living,
By taking and grabbing
What Amex is giving.

With so much time spent
Registering your pile,
You can go make a living
With dignity and style.

Break up those cards
Before it’s too late,
Amex will be looking
To us they will hate.

Spend Motzoei Shabbos wisely
Enjoy a night at home,
Don’t run with the madness
Hope you liked my poem

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26 COMMENTS

  1. 1) “Is this Hashem’s will For us to make a living, By taking and grabbing What Amex is giving.”

    I have no idea, you?

    2) “With so much time spent Registering your pile, You can go make a living With dignity and style.”

    Which job pays $30 per 5 seconds?

    3) “Break up those cards Before it’s too late,
    Amex will be looking The Jews they will hate.”

    How do they know the cardholders’ religion?

  2. It’s so beautiful that this poem writer has a very heightened sense of yashrus. However, the Torah does not encourage being judgemental of other people. There are people who can use a few extra dollars and it does not violate any Torah or civic laws to take advantage of small business Saturday. I therefore find this post to be in poor taste.

  3. Very nice poem. Lemaaseh, $30 per Amex cc, is not bad. I have 3 of them & it would be silly not to use it. With the money saved, could donate to Tzidaka.

  4. Not everyone with a number of cards is “making up names”. I happen to have 3 of my own amex accounts and wife wife has three others. We are each authorized users/additional card holders on the other’s accounts which totals 12 cards. This is completely in line with what amex does want to accomplish. $360 is not a small amount to forgo without a good reason. Many people also have children above the age of 15 entitling an additional card on each account per child without playing any games. I see no reason to “shame” people into not participating bec. others think they are taking advantage.

  5. Didn’t like it sorry. Most Jews are honest and don’t have fake cardholders. There’s nothing wrong with having legit additional cardholders and taking advantage of a great promotion.

  6. Probably took you more time to make up the poem than it ttto me to register.
    I use my real name and ssn or my wife’s for all cards, no fakes.
    And I have a full time real job

  7. You do realize it took longer for you to write this poem tham to register your card, right?
    Oh and for your card you get money so its kind of a win-win. Unlike your silly poem.
    I did like it though

  8. actually i hated your poem. while i happen to have nine amex cards for small business saturday, all of them are legit. i didn’t use any fake names or information. there is nothing wrong with getting cards for points and having lots of credit.

  9. Instead of waiting on lines,
    I think I’ll write some rhymes,
    About how it’s not ehrlach,
    & how it’s geferlach.
    I’ll scream & I’ll shout,
    Not knowing what I’m talking about,
    I’ll stay in my home,
    All depressed and alone.
    How do I make ends meet?
    It’s no easy feat.
    See I don’t have a job
    I’m just a simple fat slob.
    I after deals I can’t run,
    Because I don’t know how to have fun.
    So how do I sustain
    My family in a way that is Shain?
    It’s simple, indeed
    I just say I’m in need
    To to government and others
    Who support Children Infants & Mothers
    I have my food stamps
    So My lifestyle it won’t cramp
    Of course I get section 8
    I didn’t get in too late
    & Mi Keamcha Yisroel,
    Who Ad Bias Goel
    Every single Thursday night
    When nobody is in sight
    & without causing a fright
    Drop off a package of food
    That is really quite good.
    Now understand when I say
    There’s no need to go cray
    When trying to support
    Your entire cohort
    If you are as ehrlach as me
    It’s something you’ll see
    There are other ways of getting everything for free.

  10. I am glad that someone is making this point. I have often wondered if these credit card shticks are good for Klal Yisroel. It’s true its good to save money when possible, but do we want to be know as the people with 30 credit cards to grab every points deal? I don’t think we are living up to being an ohr l’goyim, even if it is completely muttar.

  11. Instead of waiting on lines,
    I think I’ll write some rhymes,
    About how it’s not ehrlach,
    & how it’s geferlach.
    I’ll scream & I’ll shout,
    Not knowing what I’m talking about,
    I’ll stay in my home,
    All depressed and alone.
    How do I make ends meet?
    It’s no easy feat.
    See I don’t have a job
    I’m just a simple fat slob.
    I after deals I can’t run,
    Because I don’t know how to have fun.
    So how do I sustain
    My family in a way that is Shain?
    It’s simple, indeed
    I just say I’m in need
    To to government and others
    Who support Children Infants & Mothers
    I have my food stamps
    So My lifestyle it won’t cramp
    Of course I get section 8
    I didn’t get in too late
    & Mi Keamcha Yisroel,
    Who Ad Bias Goel
    Every single Thursday night
    When nobody is in sight
    & without causing a fright
    Drop off a package of food
    That is really quite good.
    Now understand when I say
    There’s no need to go cray
    When trying to support
    Your entire cohort
    If you are as ehrlach as me
    It’s something you’ll see
    There are other ways of getting everything for free.

  12. Instead of waiting on lines,
    I think I’ll write some rhymes,
    About how it’s not ehrlach,
    & how it’s geferlach.
    I’ll scream & I’ll shout,
    Not knowing what I’m talking about,
    I’ll stay in my home,
    All depressed and alone.
    How do I make ends meet?
    It’s no easy feat.
    See I don’t have a job
    I’m just a simple fat slob.
    I after deals I can’t run,
    Because I don’t know how to have fun.
    So how do I sustain
    My family in a way that is Shain?
    It’s simple, indeed
    I just say I’m in need
    To to government and others
    Who support Children Infants & Mothers
    I have my food stamps
    So My lifestyle it won’t cramp
    Of course I get section 8
    I didn’t get in too late
    & Mi Keamcha Yisroel,
    Who Ad Bias Goel
    Every single Thursday night
    When nobody is in sight
    & without causing a fright
    Drop off a package of food
    That is really quite good.
    Now understand when I say
    There’s no need to go cray
    When trying to support
    Your entire cohort
    If you are as ehrlach as me
    It’s something you’ll see
    There are other ways of getting everything for free.

  13. Make sure you register your Amex cards BEFORE Shabbos, so it will take affect.

    The writer is bitter because he doesn’t have any Amex cards. Very sad.

  14. number 7, it’s ok to look to live on programs lechatchila and let uncle sam support us but not to try to get credit card points? The credit card companies encourage you to get more cards and give the points so you will charge more. I would much rather be known as the person who has a lot of legitimate points and therefore gets freebies than the person being supported by uncle sam by choice. no one has taines on the people earning points. They are not taking from anyone. People on programs are living off other people!

  15. The writer is correct. It is a sham to swipe the same card three times and it is a scam when stores let you bring terminals home to swipe your tens or hundreds of cards. It is a clear abuse of a system meant to encourage shopping at small businesses. Lets hope this all doesn’t result in one huge chilul Hashem,

  16. Sadly true, last night was crazy. Stores had lines with people screaming and fighting over places and times in lines. Some places also offered incentives for those that bought gift cards, resulting in “Ribbis D’oriysa”. I B”h canceled my cards and I hope others will follow as well. This is a poor example of chinuch and embarrassing to be a part of.

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