The Matzav Shmoooze: Shabbos Nachamu Hype


shabbos-nachamuDear readers,

I am amazed and perplexed by the common perception that there is some kind of “chiyuv” to go away forShabbos Nachamu. It has become an obligation of sorts for young couples and others to go away – somewhere, anywhere – for this Shabbos, the Shabbos after Tisha B’Av.

How this started I don’t know.

Why it started I don’t know.

It seems like people just have an urge to get up and go. And if you don’t go away? Oy va voy. You are a complete neb. Yep, a neb. After all, can’t you find some place other than your own home to spend Shabbos Nachamu? And if you are staying home, you better be hosting another family and be making a real “matzav.” I mean, this is Shabbos Nachamu after all.

And I won’t even get into Motzoei Shabbos Nachamu….

What’s up with all the Shabbos Nachamu hype?

Staying Home But Won’t Admit It


The Matzav Shmoooze is a regular feature on that allows all readers to share a thought or analysis, long or short, one sentence or several paragraphs long, on any topic, for readers to mull over and comment on. Email submissions to

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  1. I can’t afford to go away so I’m staying home…..going to in-laws next week does that count?

    Maybe I’m such a big neb that I don’t even feel like one?

  2. You are right!!!!! Most jews these days especially the young want to make Judaism into a fashionable sport! Too true!!! (but a little holiday once in a while is probably pretty good especially if the kiddies need a change in scenery!!!).

  3. Why do you have such a complex? I’m staying home with my wife and kids (ie no guests) and don’t feel inadequate or any need to hide that I’m staying home.
    A)Why do you care so much what other people think about you
    B)Why do you think other people view you as a neb just because they happen to be going away?

    You need to be more secure and not worry about what you perceive others may think about you!!

    Have a nice quiet Shabbos!

  4. Did you ever think that maybe shabbos nachamu happens to come smack in the middle of summer right after the zman ends? That’s when people have a chance to have a change of scenery. I’m sorry if you can’t do it (if I knew who you are I would invite you to my home)
    BTW I also stay home but I’m not kvetching about it

  5. One reason for going away is that just as the body needs food replenishment after two fasts in the ‘three weeks’ so does the soul which was depressed from a void of simcha.

    The real question one should ask is where did the custom of having Motzei Shabbos Nachmu concerts come from especially when the Shulchan Aruch states immediately following Hilchos Tisha B’Av that live music should be restricted all year with the exception of simchas such as chasunahs.

    Any answers to that question?

  6. This an ancient minhag in K’lal Yisrael, dating way back to the mid- 20th century, which was nisyased through the Rebbe R’ Shlomo of holy memory, who each year on Motzei Shabbos would raise the spirits of the people in the Catskill Mountains in unison.

  7. the jewish people thrive off of ‘chagim’ or yomim tovim special days of the year. Shabbos Nachuma has obtained such a status.

  8. I couldn’t agree with the writer more he is so right, people just don’t want to Admit to it. There is nothing wrong with being your own house and you are totally normal for doing so. By the way the people who Go away don’t always enjoy it, Truthfully and truthfully speaking there is no place like home.

  9. Bravo. It’s about time someone said something about this mishugas. You’re invited to please join me for a Shabbos Nachamu seudah at my air-conditioned home in Brooklyn. Kol Hakavod!!

  10. Shabbos Nachamu is a regular Shabbos for me, sometimes we go away like on any other Shabbos an sometimes we stay home.

  11. Yes we’re staying home. Its tha last Shabbos that my older kids will be home before leaving next week for sleepaway camp. We are making an early Shabbos so we’ll have plenty of time to shmooze. We have all the AC’s on in the house. It will be comfortable. The only thing I’m perhaps slightly jelous of, is the fact that I can’t go swimming. I hope all of Kllal Yisroel has a safe Shabbos.
    P.S. Don’t tell the Shadchanim that we stay in the City for Shabbos Nachamu!

  12. Funny and satire and who cares?

    If you want to go away, visit or invite others that is wonderful.. If you want to stay home that is wonderful too.

    If you cant be happy with either choice then see a mental health professional since you are allowing others to make decisions about your choices and effecting your emotions. and that is very NEBBY…

  13. were a young couple & were not going to our shever & Shvigger for Shabbos nachamu.

    we do what we feel is best for us & stay away from our desires to go away so we can also be like everyone else.


  14. You think by editing my comment, you’re so smart?! You are a bunch of immature babies with a specific immature agenda!

  15. Klal yisrael could use some fun. Everyone is home from yeshiva for a few weeks and it’s a great time to go somewhere as a family.

    Let’s not confuse culture with hallacha. Many things our community does are largely cultural. Shabbos nachamu is one of those times. For the record: I’ve lived in Brooklyn, the five towns and queens and rarely if ever went away. Many families stay home and enjoy no lines or waiting at any of the great local entertainment (bowling, pizza etc).

  16. There is no halacha that one has to go away Shabbos Nachamu. It may be that after Tisha B’Av that was so intense with the hot weather this year,people just feel they need to go on vacationand be relaxing in a change of scenery. Years ago, singles went up to the Pine View and the Pioneer Hotels. And this was a normal and inexpensive way for many young people to meet and many excellent marriages resulted from these weekends. Anyone know what I am talking about?