Listen: The Matzav Shmoooze: Why Are We Ostracizing the Singles of Our Communities?

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19 COMMENTS

  1. I wish you would have spent your time presenting ideas to alleviate the issue presented.
    First, asking older singles for berachos is a way of saying, hi mr suffering nebach. You are a tzaddik and i am a struggling father/son. Please bentch me. The ludicruousness of your idea is totally bizzare and might be oiver malbin penei chavero.
    I am wondering if this is an april fools joke.
    Here are some ideas!
    1. Keep having singles shabbatons.
    2. Create support groups run ONLY by professionals
    3. The community should hire professional shadchanim who work w the singles full time withour demanding 10 or 15 grand.
    4. Support project nasi!
    5. Boys should date at 21. Increase the boy pool.
    6. Dont ask them for a beracha. Invite them for shabbos and just be normal w them.
    7. Take their name and daven for them. Do NOT share w others who you are davening for.

  2. Important to speak positively about older singles. When asked information about your older single friend sister aunt niece… Speak enthusiastically .. don’t say things like leave me out of it she’s picky.. don’t get me involved! These ppl have blood on their hands speaking this way! U can and have ruined many shiduchim this way!

  3. As an older single very well said,but that will not change because that’s the system we live in,wat I think really has to be done is setting up more shaddchanim to get involved not organizations regular people, and there shldnt be the same few officially top shaddchnim running the show!

  4. Thanks to the speaker for his sensitive, articulate, on-target presentation of this very important issue.

    In the gemara already R. Yochanan speaks highly of רווק הדר בכרך אונו חוטא (פסחים קיא ע”ב).

    בשורות טובות, ברכה והצלחה

  5. I speak from experience. You said that part of our suffering is known on an obvious level, the loneliness, etc. I don’t think most people even understand that level of suffering. One would have to put themselves in our place to really feel it and very few would put in the effort to simulate that pain. The feelings the speaker expressed are real. I know because I live it every day and have lived it for many years. Thank G-D I’m still frum and that, in itself, is a miracle! Many have gone OTD for less painful reasons.

  6. What would you like for our community to do differently that wouldn’t ‘Add a collective negative effect of The Fragile marriage fabric of our communities?

    The problem is that many of the singles are atypical which should not be considered a fault but is
    in our bourgeoisie communities .

    Ostracize is the wrong one to use the term ostracized the wrong one to use. What would you like for our community to do differently that wouldn’t wouldn’t what is offering 10 weeks weekend The Fragile marriage Oriental fabric of our community of ourselves and communities most advice. Given given on these on these topics does usually does just that unfortunately.? The other problem is that many of the singles are someone a typical which should not be considered a fault but is in our bourgeoisie style communities is different. That if anything is the issue should be the issue that dressed and communities are to Consumers stick family bourgeoisie

    • i totally disagree with you that many singles are “atypical” . most of the older singles i know are solid frum good normal bais yaakov girls from good beautiful frum heimish families! i cant imagine the pain you are causing the older singles reading this by you stereotyping them as “atypical” !

  7. What would you like for our community to do differently that wouldn’t ‘Add a collective negative effect of The Fragile marriage fabric of our communities?

    The problem is that many of the singles are atypical which should not be considered a fault but is
    in our bourgeoisie communities

  8. The signs are intentional. Please see Kiddushin 29B.

    There’s a reason for this. Is the comparison to a disease correct.

    Is the comparison to Aushwitz correct?

    In Western Civilization’s worldview, marriage has become meaningless. But, is that our view? Will they still have that civilization (which they are hating themselves about) in 50 years?

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