Dear Matzav Inbox,
Each year, as Purim approaches, we eagerly anticipate the sacred and joyous mitzvah of hearing the Megillah. It is a time to celebrate and relive the miracle of our ancestors’ deliverance from the evil hand of Haman. But, unfortunately, a growing trend threatens to overshadow this special occasion. As a parent and a member of our Yeshiva community, I feel it must be addressed before it becomes even more pervasive: the incessant noise during the Megillah laining.
Let’s be honest. It’s no longer a rare occurrence to find ourselves struggling to hear the Megillah over the chatter of children, the clattering of noisemakers, and, at times, outright disruption from those too young to grasp the significance of the mitzvah. Yes, I understand the joy, excitement, and energy of Purim. But there is a missing balance—a balance between joyous celebration and respect for the sacred words of the Megillah.
At times, the noise reaches such a level that even the most seasoned Ba’al Koreh struggles to carry out the laining with the necessary precision and clarity. How can we expect our children to absorb the kedusha of this mitzvah when the environment is too chaotic to hear the words properly? What happened to the respect and reverence for the experience of hearing the Megillah?
The issue is not merely the volume of the noise but the lack of mindfulness surrounding it. In many shuls, particularly those with younger children, the message has become blurred. In previous generations, children were taught the importance of being quiet and respectful during the laining, even if they weren’t fully engaged in the words. Today, however, it’s common to see little ones running around, adults struggling to manage their excitement in ways that disrupt the reading, and some parents not even attempting to teach their children how to be still and focused for the few moments it takes to hear the Megillah properly.
A Solution: Creating a Balance Between Joy and Respect
We must preserve the joy of Purim—it is, after all, a day of celebration, and our children should certainly feel that energy. However, we must do so with proper guidance and understanding. Here are a few practical solutions:
1. Pre-Purim Education
In the days leading up to Purim, our yeshivos and communities should initiate simple, age-appropriate discussions with children about the importance of Megillah laining. They should be taught that this is not merely an opportunity to make noise but a time to hear and internalize the miracle of Purim. Even if they cannot fully grasp every detail of the story, they should appreciate the significance of the mitzvah.
2. Designated Quiet Areas
For younger children who may struggle with staying quiet, shuls can set up a designated space where parents can take them if needed. This area could have Purim-themed activities, quiet snacks, or even a small supervised play area, ensuring that the noise does not interrupt the laining for others. Parents should be encouraged to proactively manage their children’s behavior rather than attempting to do so while also trying to follow the reading.
3. Encouraging Older Children to Set an Example
Older children, especially those old enough to understand the importance of Megillah laining, should take on the responsibility of setting a positive example. Whether helping a younger sibling remain seated or quietly following along with the text, they should feel a sense of pride in upholding the kedusha of the moment.
4. The Role of the Chazan
While the Ba’al Koreh is responsible for reading with clarity and precision, they can also help set the tone. A brief reminder before the reading can go a long way in encouraging proper conduct. A simple statement about the chiyuv to listen attentively can make a difference.
5. Post-Laining Celebration
Purim’s simcha should not be expressed during the laining itself but afterward. Shuls can arrange a festive gathering, Purim spiel, or interactive activities where children can fully express their excitement without disturbing the sanctity of the Megillah.
Conclusion
Purim is a time of immense joy, and Megillah laining is one of its central moments. But like all aspects of avodas Hashem, it requires balance. While we want our children to experience the excitement of the day, we must also ensure they understand the importance of kavod for the Megillah.
By instilling a sense of reverence, providing appropriate outlets for youthful energy, and educating our community about this issue, we can ensure that the true meaning of Purim is preserved for generations to come.
Let us all strive to maintain the kedusha of the Megillah while celebrating the miracles of Purim with the joy and respect they deserve.
A Concerned Parent
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Huh? Which “Yeshivish” community is this fellow a part of? I have been in many cities throughout my life, and always gravitated to the yeshivishe communities, and I have not come across this issue anywhere, not Boro Park (back in the old days), Williamsburg, Freehold, Lakewood, north Hollywood, Los Angeles, or anywhere.
You have my sympathies
The more realistic approach is the find another minion because what you describe is and has been a chronic issue for decades if not centuries.-very very hard to cure.
often, the yeshiva/ kollel minyonim are where you should seek kindred spirits (not the whiskey type).
Good luck
Instead of signing your name with some poor version of “anonymous” write your address so people can drop their children off at your home while going to take part in an “age old tradition” of listening to the Megila.
Purim has come super early this year!!!
Find a different shul!
My shul is quiet and orderly
“and focused for the few moments it takes to hear the Megillah properly”
I have no idea where you go for leining but it’s 40 to 50 minutes long in most places
Thanks for this very important letter!
In a Shul I sometimes daven in (YIAK) they have the following practice to deal with this. There are two separate minyanim – megillah readings. The first is without children, and in it when המן is mentioned shoes can tap the floor for some rumbling, but that’s it basically. Later on, after the first leining/davening is finished (which is not too long, without lengthy noisemaking), another reading is done with children allowed (I assume that there may be limits there too, not total hefkerus, chas veshalom, but am not sure exactly), and more leeway for noise when המן הרשע is mentioned.
End all banging by the Hamans. It is so immature and babyish. I see older men banging by every Haman. So stupid and disruptive. The only aitza is, allow banging by the first mention of Haman, and the very last mention. That’s it.
Dear A Concerned Parent,
There is a special line of clothing for you, Dockers for Alta-Kokers.
You must really be an old grouch if you can’t handle a little noise to boo out our enemy’s name.
Chill out, at least on Purim.
While the author raises some valid points, this perspective feels unnecessarily harsh and disconnected from the true essence of Purim. Children are a central part of our community, and their excitement is not a disruption—it’s a reflection of the simcha that defines this Yom Tov. To frame their natural energy as a threat to the kedusha of the Megillah is both unfair and discouraging.
Of course, there should be a basic level of respect during the laining—but Purim was never meant to be a somber, rigid occasion. The noise of children, the clatter of graggers, and the vibrant atmosphere are part of what makes the day so unique. If previous generations emphasized quiet, perhaps we’ve progressed to understand that creating positive associations with mitzvos is more important than enforcing silence through discipline.
Instead of calling out parents for not controlling their children, the focus should be on fostering an environment where kids feel connected and welcome—even if that means things are a little noisier. The true challenge isn’t the volume—it’s cultivating patience, tolerance, and joy alongside kavod. Maybe it’s time to embrace the beautiful chaos that makes Purim what it is, rather than trying to suppress it.
This is the dumbest of the dumb