Dear Matzav Inbox,
I’ve had enough. Enough of the unholy obsession with money that has overtaken our communities, enough of the idol worship of the so-called “Gvirim” in our midst who are raised on a pedestal just because they happen to have deep pockets.
It’s about time we call this out for what it is: an absolute disgrace and a cancer that is eating away at the heart of our kehillos.
When did our Torah values get so twisted that the size of a person’s wallet became the measure of their worth? When did we start elevating people for nothing more than their ability to donate? Is this really what we stand for? Is this how we want our children to grow up, believing that the ones who write big checks are the ones who deserve respect and admiration, no matter what kind of people they are?
It’s bad enough that these so-called “Gvirim” are treated like royalty, but it goes even further. They are given a free pass to do anything they want, no matter how reprehensible, because of their financial standing. They are celebrated, praised, and admired, with their every move watched and followed like it’s some kind of holy act. Why? Because they can give to mosdos. As if that somehow makes everything else irrelevant. We’ve been made to believe that the more money they throw around, the closer they are to holiness.
This is not the Torah way. The true measure of a person’s value lies in their character, their commitment to Torah, and their actions. It has nothing to do with the number of zeroes on their bank account. Yet here we are, living in a society where our children are taught that the more you have, and the more you can give, and the more you can do—no matter how questionable your actions—the more you are worth.
How sick is it that mosdos are falling over themselves to curry favor with these individuals, bowing down to their every whim? I know that mosdos are struggling and are desperate, but does mean that we throw our values in the garbage? Do we stand for nothing anymore but the Mighty Dollar?
How sick is it that the message we send to our youth is that money equals worth, influence, and virtue?
Our children are growing up in an environment where the most important thing they see is not limud haTorah, not hasmadah, not ehrlichkeit, not aidelkeit, not dikduk b’mitzvos, not avodas Hashem, not middos, not yashrus and honesty—but how much money someone has and can contribute.
What happened to the simple, humble way of life that our parents embraced? Where are the role models who lived their lives based on pure, reine Torah, not their bank balances?
Let’s be clear: this glorification of money and power is doing immense damage. It’s corrupting our values, it’s teaching our children that the more wealth you have, the more power you hold. It’s creating a system where integrity and humility are secondary to your ability to write a check. It’s spreading a toxic mindset that, unless you have money, you’ll never be seen as choshuv.
It’s time we stop this madness. It’s time we return to the true values that built our Torah community, not the hollow, materialistic culture that is poisoning it. We need to stop elevating people based solely on their financial status.
We owe it to our children to show them that what matters is not what’s in a person’s bank account, but what’s in their heart and soul.
The Gvir culture needs to end now.
Sincerely,
D. R.
A Concerned Member of Klal Yisroel
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You need to get a job.
When I couldn’t afford a BMW a could’ve written a 500 page book on the lowliness of the type of ppl that drive one.
Now that I could afford one I can write a 500 page book why it’s KEDAI to get one.
Our blessing to you…. You should be come a BIG GVIR and you’ll see how quickly your attitude changes.
Love and Peace,
Am Yisroel
That’s exactly the man’s point. You become rich. You think you have a deyah
I suggest you re-read this article, you are exactly what is wrong with society. If you didnt understand the message in it and by proof of your shameless reply…. This is how important this article is. I was given a link by a friend to this article and it is travelling fast.
Now that I have made money I can I can write a 500 page book why it`s not worth giving up part of my Olam HaBah for enjoying the fleeting sense of pride owning such a luxury car.
I have taken up learning which has given me much greater sipuk and when I see how my showy friends can barely say over the Reid Bites theyve heard in while looking at their statuses and I know I`m not missing anything
Disgusting answer to a great letter !
Your probably not Jewish
As you drive your Nazi mobile try not forget your bubbes and zaides that burned.
Is there a shortage of luxury cars that yidden need to driven Nazi mobiles nowadays?
Some of us had opportunities to become that.But we turned it down
Because that’s not a healthy place for us nor for the jews.
Chalk up another bloke who couldn’t resist the siren
Why writing to Matzav???? Enough of these ridiculous letters, they help NOTHING.
Go speak to the rabonim and rosh yeshivos and tell them to address it.
Look, you read it. That’s the point.
Please give an example because I have no clue what you’re talking about?
Interesting article, I think the problem is greater then you are presenting. You are wondering why we look up to the wealthy and no longer look up to the gedoleih torah, the answer to that is because the gedoileh torah look up to the wealthy so in theory we are looking up to the same people that the gedolim are looking up to.
I will give you a few examples:
Who sits at the head table in a certain chassidus, gets a mitzvah tantz at each wedding, dances with the rebbe during the kabolas ponim… a billionaire that is not shomer Shabbos. so what example does that set?!?!
I learned in a prominent yeshiva here in America and had world renowned rabeim. the night of my wedding a donor from a different state was making a simcha and all the rabeim / rosh Hayeshiva went there and not one member of the administration came to mine. so they went to the wedding of money instead of going to the wedding of someone that was a talmid for years.
how expensive is the shtreimel that a certain rebbe wears? well over 5k
who sits on the dais at the siyum hashas and the adireih hatorah?
A friend of mine applied to join Hatzalah. for reference, he has over 10 years of emergency experience. His application was rejected. that same week a shnook who just came out of EMT school dropped 100k and got in no problem.
by Adirei Hatorah the dais was full of Roshei Yeshiva, Rabbonim, and Roshei Chaburah
Your rebbeim and rosh yeshiva went to dance by the wedding of the donor who made your hatzlocho in Yeshiva (and through that your shidduch) possible, and cultivate a relationship to allow more bachurim to learn.
If the Gvirim are supporting Torah institutions then they deserve kavod. I don’t have those resources so I understand that I will not be an honoree at a Yeshiva dinner. I don’t begrudge a wealthy person their kavod if they are supporting institutions that I use and help to produce B’nei and B’nos Torah. And I certainly don’t skip the lavish kiddushes if somebody else is paying 🙂
They will get Schar in shamayim. It causes a tremendous Yerida to other students and Talmidim very often with them in the same classroom. If the Gvirim and others that have protektzia would accept their rejection to mosdos and not use their money to get in then also them and the rest would have much more Nachas from their kids.
This is a really good point. A lot of us benefit from the gvirim donating to Torah institutions and chessed organizations.
When I wanted to switch from public high school to a private Orthodox high school, I was able to do so because the school allowed my still-secular parents to pay minimum tuition, as the teenage me had no way of paying tuition myself.
The school was able to do this because of the gvirim donating the money to enable this kind of flexibility.
I would honor them myself, but never learned who they are. And I’m grateful.
cute. They help the newbies. That is till your children make it close enough to start stepping in their territory
I’m sorry my comment was only about myself.
The gvirim and everyone else also assisted all the Russian-speaking Jewish immigrants with tuition, housing, food, etc.
There were other Jewish families (not newbies) in this school system who received years of tuition assistance too.
In one case, one family suffered such poor finances that their shul permanently paid their rent. They also received help with tuition so their children could receive an Orthodox Jewish education. This assistance with rent and tuition went on for years.
(This ended up being a waste of money as this family eventually left the community and reverted to their former non-Jewish life.)
I very much hope that you too find a community more compatible with your own attitude toward money.
I enjoyed this read very much as I am landing in lakewood airport
lol
OP, do you expect people to change because you said they should? You can only change yourself.
You don’t mention one instance where gvirim are “bowed” to or idolized.
It’s in your mind.
As for true respect, that’s in Halacha. They are SUPPOSED to get shishi.
Other than that your kids idolize what you idolize.
As one thats involved in a moised that befirush doesnt accept pple for money. There are plenty of examples; not everything needs to be spelled out. The true bnei torah and tzaddikim in this generation agree and connect with this article perfectly! Funny enough, those that are wealthy and did get into the moised because their children are compatible arent giving a penny ; that’s because they arent given the kavod they are waiting for.
Apparently OlamHabaa is just for Gvirim.
It could be that just because you can put up a tent every Monday and Thursday that you should
A it can be an Asin hara particularly because there are so many that can not put up a tent once in 20 yrs.
Thank you for your generous offer to build our school buildings, pay our Rebbeim, fund our Hachnosas Kallah, build our mikvaos, bankroll tomchei Shabbos, and so much more without any fanfare or recognition.
Your generosity is deeply appreciated and your anonymity will be protected.
LOL.
This writer is acting as though the Rabbis want to beg for money from these people.
I guarantee you that if the community didn’t need the money nobody would be going out of their way to show respect to the millionaires and billionaires.
Facts are the community has needs and the few wealthy people who are willing to put their hand in pocket and help the community time after time deserve our respect.
Ridiculous
Like the Thomas Nast tycoons they stepped on so many to get there.
Then they give back a part for your paparazzi
You are 1000% correct. However this is starting from the top down. If the Rabbanim and Roshei yeshiva and Rebbes wouldn’t go along with it the n we wouldn’t have this. I could understand why they do this but if they’re such foreign shanayim they wouldn’t be doing this. It’s beyond disgusting and disgraceful. It has carried over to so many aspects of our lives from acceptance to schools, shidduchim etc
Without getting into the discussion, I think most would agree that even if this letter has merit, the tone is offensive and over the top. “Cancerous”?? please. We talk like that about terrorists, not about yidden shomrei torah umitzvos, especially those who dole out millions to tzedaka.
Always remember: smartphones are assur, without any exceptions. Even for work.
And you do not need a smartphone to run a business, practically any business
there are many cases in point of ppl who have no smartphones and run successful businesses
Maybe for managing a candy store.
If you’re in any position of real estate, you need to be connected to get that deal. Every second counts. No time to be a frummy and wait till you get back to the office in 6 hours.
I actually agree so they should stop supporting yeshivas and kollim stop supporting our Shules
Stop giving way fortunes to every tzadukah that knocks on their door
But those going to pay the bills to keep them open or pay the rebbes livable wages(I hope) or care for those destitute. Certainly not you
GET a JOB
No one is being honored for being rich. They are being honored for what they do with their money. These “gvirim” give away each year more than you and I earn in 10 years, and sometimes more than that. They enable the regular hard working balei batim and Rabbonim to send their kids to the same Yeshivas that they send their own children to, by subsidizing our tuition. They build Kollelim, Shuls and institutions that service all of us. We who are earning a respectable living, are essentially taking welfare from them by receiving benefit daily from their benevolence. Is Hakaras Hatov for the hand that feeds you, not a Torah value?
First off, regardless if your points have any merit which I’ll come to in a minute, you could have made your point in two or three lines but instead you went on a rampage and showed a lot of your true colors and perhaps if you go back and read your letter you’ll see how repetitive you sound.
Now to your points… take it from me who also wishes that I had more money and look at gevirim sometimes and wished that I had not more money per se, but the menuchas hanefesh that money can bring… but your points that you made, with all due respect stinks of jealousy because more often than not whether its Yeshivas, schools or tzedaka organizations or anything else these gevirim or supporters are asked or begged to join the board or to be on the committee and are asked to give of their time to advise or to give their opinion or share their expertise precisely because they are successful business people or people who have run big companies and so your ranting why we listen to these gevirim and all the rest of your comments are really uncalled for….and again they stink of jealousy.
It’s human nature. Rashi says on the posuk of וַיָּ֨רָץ לָבָ֧ן אֶל־הָאִ֛ישׁ הַח֖וּצָה Why did he run and what did he run for? Because when he saw the rings he said this is a rich person…
It’s almost forty since I learned this in seventh grade but I still appreciate my rebbe taking the next half hour to speak about gvir culture and people foolishly giving special deference to very rich guy in shul and society (he isn’t going to start giving out handouts if you suck up to him)
Of note, that rebbe himself was a very wealthy person from real estate he was involved in on the side.
I can’t entirely answer your questions: “When did our Torah values get so twisted that the size of a person’s wallet became the measure of their worth? When did we start elevating people for nothing more than their ability to donate?” … but this was the case back in the 80s when most institutions had banquets honoring these folks. Nothing new here.
My question would be why is there a new animosity and bitterness aimed toward g’virim? Jealousy … a hard time instilling different values in your children? Many people, many reasons, I suppose.
The letter writer is 100% correct – but in Utopia.
Without the gevirim giving their money to the needed tzedakahs, all the mosdos, shuls, gemachs, mikvas, etc would be in deep trouble. Everybody is crying about the high tuitions they can’t afford (a very serious problem for everybody including the mosdos) – but without the donations of the gevirim; tuitions would be much higher.
Anon is also 100% correct. As Rav Shneur Kotler zt”l said many times at the Agudah Conventions – that if the gevirim would give ma’aser to tzedakah, there would be more than enough for all the mosdos haTorah and tzedakahs. In fact, he said, there would be a Bais Din sitting to decide from who they should or should not take money from. But that too is in Utopia.
In the meantime follow Chazal – Rebbi (Rabeinu Hakodosh) was “mechabed” the gevirim. We also have to. At least until the gevirim learn the Sifrei Mussar and realize that it’s not their money – they are just the RBS”O’s messengers.
I agree but if you think about how they make their money it is a real lowly way. A lot of gevirim sadly take terrible advantage of old people when they run their nursing home. I am someone that volunteers visiting the old and just seeing how our zekeinem are treated is truly disgusting they get no hygiene their nails grow long I even know of a home that charges to cut their hair. When I speak to the nurses they tell me how overwhelmed they are as they don’t have enough coverage. The aids smell like weed it is scary to think that out grandparents are suffering so much how we have forgotten the torah command to respect the old and instead the rich people make more money and then we bow down to this dirty money. How sad how sad it is a true disgrace.
Strange.
If you would not have these gevirim supporting YOUR mosdos then YOU could not train your children to be gedolim. In fact, if your letter is to be understood, you probably can’t wait for your kids to be gevirim.
There is a reason why “Rebbi Mechabed es ha’asheerim”. GOOD reason. There is a reason why
Torah includes and recommends Yisachar and Zevulun shufus.
So calm down, Go learn and wait for your check – either from the Kollel, Wife, Shver, Father and don’t worry about the gevirim who support YOU.
” They are SUPPOSED to get shishi.”
????????????
the slumlords and nursing home guys get all the power,
After so many suffer to get where they are
Lack of higher education has fostered a culture of dependence.
Look inward first.
You guys
You guys have it all wrong. It’s not from the top down it’s from the bottom up. There’s become a crazy chase for the dollar in our communities from the average Joe way worse then then in secular and non Jewish communities. The Roshei yeshiva need to do what they need to do to keep up with payroll. But the average Harry should not keep being obsessed with money… needless to say the kids copy what they hear their father talk about all day and at the shabbos table —and yes the entire leining too. Shame shame
Find a community that’s not like your description; there are many. This is more productive than complaining here.
Boy are you super jelous of the Gevirim!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Yeah, we are. If they are quiet, all is good. But if they become in-your-face, then we have a serious problem. Then it’s eyen hara time and it ain’t gonna be pretty.
The Nodah Biyehudas grandfather,an earlier Rav of PRAGUE was asked why he had so low an opinion of gvirim. Wasn’t rebbi
mechabed them?
His response: Yes,how? He wanted originally to put them in the Mishna with Cheiresh,Shoteh,V’kattan,but decided to leave them off
Your only option is to move to the mountains. Right or wrong there is no way to stop the train.
They have always claimed that. Before Every change.
There’s nothing wrong & much social benefit with healthy criticism
Kudos to the op-ed
The Mafia gives millions to the catholic church with the beleif that it cures thier evil deeds and gives them catharsis and forgivness. Mafiosos throw block parties for neighbors give out lavish gifts. The Mafiosos are celebraties in thier neihborhoods. Mafia families have magnificent weddings, confirmation parties Xmas parties New Yers parties 4th of July fireworks extravaganzas. The Preists local polititians Heads of School, all in thier quiet way give the Mafia all out chanifa, kovod and the best kibbudim in thier worlld. Many Mafiosos get indicted go to jail and do time in prison. thier schemes get exposed, thier bribery, kickbacks from unions. local government get exposed. At the end of the day we are the same human beings. The Orthodox Jewish world in all denominations chases the Mafiosos, glorfies them wants to be them. Every shnook coming out of highschool wants to be in the Nursing Home Bussines or latch on to a mortgage scheme govenment scheme. if you fly commercial and dont have a personal chef personal shopper, a home you live in and three vacation homes Charedie culture doomed you a second class citizen or better described “a shlepper”
Was your last bit on the Orthodox Jewish world satire?
It is not remotely true.
Sorry, but it undoubtedly is
IMPORTANT TO READ THIS
PELE YOETZ ON FLATTERY:
Nevertheless it is necessary to clarify precisely what chanifa is. That is because there are types of flattery which are not prohibited as chanifa but those who lack proper halachic understanding insist that they are prohibited. For example they mistakenly consider a person who honors a wealthy man as being a flatterer while someone who protests against and ridicules the rich takes pride in his disparagement and claims that he does not know how to flatter. However he greatly errs in what he says because it is in fact proper and fitting to show respect to the wealthy – as we see that Rabbi Yehuda HaNasi and Rabbi Akiva honored the rich (Eiruvin 86a). The reason is that because G-d desires that this man be valued and He therefore has bestowed upon him an abundance of blessings from Above – we are also obligated to honor him. This is especially true for any person who has been the beneficiary of the rich person that he is clearly obligated to honor him. Furthermore the rich person since he has more possessions he is more likely to increase the amount of mitzvos and good deed that he does – compared to the less wealthy and this in turn reverses the spiritual damage done by his sins. Therefore it is appropriate to show him some respect – even if he has done something inappropriate and has deviated slightly from the correct path – and consequently he shouldn’t demean the rich man as much as a poor man. We learn this from Pesachim (53a) where the Sages say, “If it were not that you are Todus we would excommunicate you.” It is explained that they moderated their criticism because he provide food for Torah scholars.
These are the words of a Gadol backed up from chazal.
The Pele Yoetsz is talking about people who are a legitimate Givir. A Bal Mazal in Parnassah that earn thier money honestly and have been bestowed bountiful by Hashem. However we chonfer bow(ed) to the Cash Advance guys. The biggest Yesivas and institutions, this blog glorifies Nursing Home cheats even when they are outed in public that they treat elderly humans beings gossly inhumanly all the while fressing down thier kobe beef platters, meat boards and 1k bottles of tequila while sitting comfy in thier private jet flights or are indicted.
Why won’t this person sign his name? How seriously can you take an unsigned pashkovil?
Those defending the rich miss the very basics.
Most of us come from families that could readily have been wealthy. We/Parents sacrificed that opportunity instead for the sake of constructing the present frum collective that developed- & you dwell in. The same as well goes for those were half-baked who are now rich or have titles presently. By & large-while often having had given lip service to the concept-they did not have the scruples/gumption to do accordingly
Relegate them therefore back down where they belong