Dear Matzav Inbox,
Every so often, a familiar wave of anxiety ripples through the community, as it did today. A blogger is coming. An outsider is asking questions. Someone with a camera, a notebook, or a following wants to see Lakewood — and suddenly the instinct is to retreat, to warn, to clamp down, to treat the visit as a threat rather than an opportunity.
Why?
Why are we so frightened of being seen?
If someone wants to come to Lakewood, let them come. And instead of scrambling behind the scenes or whispering about damage control, why don’t we do the most obvious, intelligent, and self-respecting thing possible: show them who we actually are.
Show them Bais Medrash Govoah, not as a buzzword or a caricature, but as the largest Talmudic academy in the country. Let them see thousands of young men learning with seriousness, discipline, and purpose, from early morning until late at night. Let them understand that this is not some fringe phenomenon, but a sustained commitment to Torah that defines an entire town.
Show them the community that exists around it — families raising children with values, schools educating tens of thousands of students, shuls full on weekday mornings. Show them neighborhoods that function, systems that work, and a population that is invested in the future of its children.
Take them down Avenue of the States. Show them the businesses, the commerce, the jobs, the storefronts, the offices, and the economic activity that supports not only our own community but the broader township as well. Let them see that Lakewood is not a burden, but a contributor, socially, economically, and civically.
And then show them what almost never gets photographed.
Show them the chesed. The charities. The volunteer organizations. The endless web of quiet generosity that steps in long before government agencies do — meals delivered without fanfare, funds raised overnight for families in crisis, medical advocacy, Bikur Cholim, gemachs of every kind. Show them the infrastructure of responsibility that exists because we believe in taking care of our own.
What exactly are we afraid they’ll uncover?
If we believe in what we are building here — and we should — then fear is not a strategy. Silence is not strength. And treating every outsider as an enemy only guarantees that the story will be written without us.
There will always be people who come with preconceived notions. There will always be critics who arrive determined to find fault. But hiding doesn’t disarm them. It empowers them. When we refuse to engage, we leave the field open to ignorance, rumor, and narrative-building by those who don’t know us and don’t care to.
We don’t need to posture or perform. We don’t need talking points or defensive statements. We need confidence…calm, intelligent confidence. We need to answer questions honestly, clearly, and like mentchen who are comfortable in their own skin.
Outsiders will talk whether we invite them or not. Bloggers will write whether we cooperate or not. The only choice we have is whether the picture they paint is based on speculation — or reality.
Lakewood is not perfect. No community is. But it is real, vibrant, productive, and deeply rooted in values that have sustained our people for centuries. That is not something to hide from. It is something to stand behind.
Stop being scared. Stop acting as if visibility is a threat. It isn’t.
Open the door. Walk them through. Let them see the truth …. not the version whispered about by people who have never set foot here, but the one lived every day by tens of thousands of families.
If we have nothing to hide, then we have nothing to fear.
Sincerely,
Y. B. H.
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Couldn’t agree with you more.
Because he doesn’t want to see the good side! He takes what ppl say and twists it. He only wants things that are sensational and gets him clicks and money! Even in the non Jewish world ppl had a lot to say about his video making.
Well said
Because they aren’t coming to see, they are coming with a predetermined agenda.
It’s sort of like an IRS audit, it isn’t about finding that you did everything correctly-it’s about finding something they can twist into an offense.
That’s a key distinction.
You’re being very naive. These “reporters” have an anti chareidie agenda and hatred. They’ve already created a false narrative. They are evil people only looking to hurt our community. We welcome fellow Yidden who are looking to return to their roots, not goyim who are seeking to harm us in any way possible.
This post is the Jewish version of woke. Yes, a rash statement. The writer ignores the facts, and the history of this blogger soeaks volumes.
This fellow was already in KJ. His reporting was grossly dishonest. Worse was his selective photography, all reinterpreted to be shameful. His video use was edited and grossly false. All he wants to do is the same thing to our neighborhood. Well, shame on him. Showing our greatness will be portrayed dishonestly. I’m not afraid. I will reject his sweet sounding interview as a Trojan Horse.
This is a different person then the person from kj
This assumes they are looking for truth. Of course they aren’t! They are looking to find whoever will say whatever will put us in the worse light to feature. Therefore nobody should talk to them. Hatzalah of KJ spent over an hour with the most recent visitor. So did other people who spoke nicely and intelligently to him. Who did he feature?
anything you tell or show these guys (ones with an agenda) will be used against u and the whole community
there’s a reason every lawyer warns their client not to answer reporters
Oh, dear. If only it was that straightforward. If only people had good intentions and weren’t looking for verbal missteps, asking loaded questions, or trying to confuse those they question in the hopes of getting responses that make us look foolish or worse, all in the hope of clicks and views. If only those who hate us wouldn’t specifically focus on aspects of frum life that may look “funny” to those who aren’t part of our community.
Going into a debate without preparation is a recipe to come out looking foolish, regardless of how right your positions are. Talking to these bloggers, many of whom have an ulterior motive to make members of our community look foolish and our community itself look bad is also not a good idea for those who don’t know how to handle their tactics.
Let them see. I live here for 25 years. I see hard-working people, men and women. I also see younger men who are married for the first 2–3 years studying full-time or part-time. They may get government assistance, they may not. It’s a very similar situation to the young Jewish world. We are young people who study sometimes receive government assistance, which has nothing wrong with that. I see people who pay taxes, income, and real estate tax. I see honest people ever I go BTW, Lakewood is mostly working people today.
haha. did you watch how they showed KJ?? Sir, how many kids do you have… Do you learn torah…
Then they come & say all jews do is learn torah & dont even have a job. They didn’t post how old someone was just that he doesn’t even have a job (mind you it was photographed outside a college & most oof the people he interviewed looked less than 24 albeit with a beard)
The letter writer is an idiot. We are not afraid of what he will see. We are afraid of his track record of writing hit pieces not based on what he sees or hears, rather what he decides to edit and splice of scenes and conversations.
That is all true when they are not looking to snip and edit answers an the video they make. This guy is trying NOT to see but to slip you up and publicize the little things that he can spin to fit his narrative. Don’t be a fool we are in galus and they are not looking for good or honest info.
A nice sentiment, perhaps, but I believe rather erroneous. When I was yungerman in BMG back in the ‘70s and ‘80s, I b”h developed a strong kesher with Rav Nosson Wachtfogel zt”l. In a vaad with him one morning, I proposed a question that was relevant to my situation, that I had been asked to make a presentation to a nonsectarian group of members of Toms River JCC (mixed non-Jews and non-religious Jews) about Jewish suffering in the Holocaust (at that time NBC was showing an 11-hr series of 2-hr films on this topic, so the JCC wanted to put up a summary video along with a discussion session for its members). He responded with a story whose bottom line message was that when non-Jews see Jewish suffering, they are non-overtly happy about it. So I think trying to get this blogger to be impressed and thereby try to impress his audience is a lost cause. IMHO
Video title
Inside the New York Town Invaded by Wellfare Addicted Jews…
Followed by a thumbnail of Chassidim looking like homeless beggars with signs that say help us
I watched the video but knew what it was about before watching. Clickbait agenda garbage decided before filming. His title should be independent activist not journalist.
my opinion: let him come (you can’t actually stop him anyways practically) but literally follow him around with cameras documenting everything he’s ‘documenting’ including any interviews he gives. then when he makes his doctored version – post a rebuttal of all the original interviews in entirety showing what he misreprented
I would think that would either scare him off or keep him honest.. and frankly – if that doesn’t help – then we have a bigger problem (vehameivin yavin)
no one will care to look at the rebuttal, btw
my opinion: let him come (you can’t actually stop him anyways practically) but literally follow him around with cameras documenting everything he’s ‘documenting’ including any interviews he gives. then when he makes his doctored version – post a rebuttal of all the original interviews in entirety showing what he misreprented
I would think that would either scare him off or keep him honest.. and frankly – if that doesn’t help – then we have a bigger problem (vehameivin yavin)
His originil video will have 9 million views. Your rebuttal will have 90.
There are those who made rebuttals – and if you want to watch it, watch it through a rebuttal video so you arent giving him clicks, But your idea is not a mehalech.
Show them Beis Hamedrash Gevoha…and he will report “doing nothing but reading books all day.”
Show them your family… and he will ask “how can you afford all these children”.
Show him women working… and he will opine “how women are forced to support their families”.
and on and on and on
they hate us.
fact.
showing them who we are will cause more hatred.
durring galus we lay low
You should have signed you name as MR. Naive. As someone wrote “They hate us because we’re rich and they hate us because we’re poor. People like Tyler aren’t looking for the truth they are looking to get hits. They don’t only go after our community every content they do is to portray it in the most negative way. And I hate to break it to you there are haters out there that hate us because we have Hatzolah, Chavarim, and all the other organisations we have.
Because no publicity is better than publicity, especially at the hands of detractors. Our lifestyle is supposed to be one of tznius. Keeping our families, our homes, our relifious observance concealed to the extent possible.
Agree with the positivity and healthy pride expressed by the letter-writer, and loved the positive attributes listed, but as many commenters noted, these vloggers are looking for negative drama and they actively seek to misconstrue and misrepresent.
Also, Zumy makes a valid point about the innate tsnius of Am Yisrael, whether male or female.
Do we know his name