AWESOME!!!!
Just so sad that the shadchanim will dismiss this and keep going against Daas Torah and push for pictures.
Girls stop sending your pictures. Don’t be intimidated by anyone who tells you that without a picture they will not redt you a shidduch. Remember it is only G-D who makes shidduchim and the Almighty has millions of messengers he can use as your Shadchan. We don’t need the picture pushers.
Bravo! Good job!! I strongly believe that the reason there are so many failed or struggling marriages is precisely bec of this point. The boys out there Are so shallow and busy with looks. That’s all they care about. The good character of a girl doesn’t stand up to how beautiful she is. When in reality all that counts is the middos. I have single guys eating by me for seudos and I hear them talking. This is about this. If this girl is pretty enough, How the other one looks. They will ask for a picture and then say no bec she’s doesn’t look the part when they don’t even care to give her personality a chance! I’ve seen stopped suggesting shidduchim for these single boys as it literally nauseates me as to how shallow they can be. And if this is how they choose to nix shidduchim then I don’t want to suggest good wonderful girls to live with boys who think the be all and end all of life is the shapwof his wife’s nose….
We need to start standing up against this practice instead of being complacent about it. Our Bnos Yisrael are taught to be tzinus until they get into shidduchim then anything goes because we are in shidduch crisis mode. Thank you for expressing the feeling of many girls who feel unable to stand up for themselves in the shidduch crisis.
So sorry all us commentors have offended you. I guess all Rabbonim against pictures have offended you as well.
The poem writer is not stereotyping ALL men. She is BH stereotyping all the boys (and their mothers) who demand to have pictures. If you fall into that category of demanding pictures then you are included in this group and we find your demand for our pictures offensive.
I agree 100%. Therefore we should do away with pictures AND profiles.
‘You need to see my resume/What do you hope to learn?/ All the camps and schools I went to/ R”L if I went to Stern..’
Don’t be so quick to point all the blame to this part of the “system”. Pictures are just as wrong as the resumePerhaps if people would meet casually or informally, and this way you’ll have the “picture” and the “info” all from the first encounter. But if we’re calling a spade a spade, the resume and picture go hand in hand.
This nonsense with being obsessed with pictures is only because we have the resume system in place. If the resume system was nixed and instead it was acceptable for boys and girls to meet in shul by a kiddush, wedding etc then boys wouldn’t be obsessed with looks bc they will be seeing the “complete picture” of the person not a piece of paper and a photo to pick and choose from. The shidduch resume system is the root of the shidduch crisis. Just to get a yes from both sides takes a while and that’s only for the first date. It’s time to put “nature” back into the picture (pun intended).
Dear oh vey! Females can say they refuse to do resumes or pictures…please stop putting the blame on the men when it’s the women posting their own pictures…
AWESOME!!!!
Just so sad that the shadchanim will dismiss this and keep going against Daas Torah and push for pictures.
Girls stop sending your pictures. Don’t be intimidated by anyone who tells you that without a picture they will not redt you a shidduch. Remember it is only G-D who makes shidduchim and the Almighty has millions of messengers he can use as your Shadchan. We don’t need the picture pushers.
Bravo! Good job!! I strongly believe that the reason there are so many failed or struggling marriages is precisely bec of this point. The boys out there Are so shallow and busy with looks. That’s all they care about. The good character of a girl doesn’t stand up to how beautiful she is. When in reality all that counts is the middos. I have single guys eating by me for seudos and I hear them talking. This is about this. If this girl is pretty enough, How the other one looks. They will ask for a picture and then say no bec she’s doesn’t look the part when they don’t even care to give her personality a chance! I’ve seen stopped suggesting shidduchim for these single boys as it literally nauseates me as to how shallow they can be. And if this is how they choose to nix shidduchim then I don’t want to suggest good wonderful girls to live with boys who think the be all and end all of life is the shapwof his wife’s nose….
Very well written, and about a topic most people are scared of.
Brilliant poem! Who’s the author?
As an older single shidduch seeking male who has been rejected and turned down because of my own picture many times , I still say :
Girls have the moral and legal right individualy and collectively to say they are not doing pictures.
End of story and of problem !
We need to start standing up against this practice instead of being complacent about it. Our Bnos Yisrael are taught to be tzinus until they get into shidduchim then anything goes because we are in shidduch crisis mode. Thank you for expressing the feeling of many girls who feel unable to stand up for themselves in the shidduch crisis.
Hi. I find her letter grossly offensive and stereotyping all men.. just adding to problems not helping. Same most comments are offensive also..
Not all men – just the ones asking for pictures
Mr Offended.
So sorry all us commentors have offended you. I guess all Rabbonim against pictures have offended you as well.
The poem writer is not stereotyping ALL men. She is BH stereotyping all the boys (and their mothers) who demand to have pictures. If you fall into that category of demanding pictures then you are included in this group and we find your demand for our pictures offensive.
I couldn’t agree more!!
Extremely distastefully written poem, cynicism at its best! Ugh
I agree 100%. Therefore we should do away with pictures AND profiles.
‘You need to see my resume/What do you hope to learn?/ All the camps and schools I went to/ R”L if I went to Stern..’
Don’t be so quick to point all the blame to this part of the “system”. Pictures are just as wrong as the resumePerhaps if people would meet casually or informally, and this way you’ll have the “picture” and the “info” all from the first encounter. But if we’re calling a spade a spade, the resume and picture go hand in hand.
Not all men – just those demanding photos.
Where is this poem from? Not surprising it’s not anonymous. Imagine what it would do for the author’s shidduch chances…
It would actually put her in a very positive light.
This nonsense with being obsessed with pictures is only because we have the resume system in place. If the resume system was nixed and instead it was acceptable for boys and girls to meet in shul by a kiddush, wedding etc then boys wouldn’t be obsessed with looks bc they will be seeing the “complete picture” of the person not a piece of paper and a photo to pick and choose from. The shidduch resume system is the root of the shidduch crisis. Just to get a yes from both sides takes a while and that’s only for the first date. It’s time to put “nature” back into the picture (pun intended).
Dear oh vey!… how bout this solution from my friend above..January 15, 2020 at 3:34 pm
As an older single shidduch seeking male who has been rejected and turned down because of my own picture many times , I still say :
Girls have the moral and legal right individualy and collectively to say they are not doing pictures.
End of story and of problem !
Reply
Dear oh vey! Females can say they refuse to do resumes or pictures…please stop putting the blame on the men when it’s the women posting their own pictures…