Poll: 81% Of Parents Think Their Children Are Ungrateful

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Most parents think it’s a high priority to teach their children gratitude because they are ungrateful, according to a new study released ahead of Thanksgiving.

The poll, conducted for the C.S. Mott Children’s Hospital in Michigan, noted that the holiday is a great opportunity to teach gratitude to children but warned that parents should make efforts to teach appreciation for what they have throughout the year.

“Over time and through experiences, children will learn to be grateful for others and appreciate what they have,” the study reads.

The study analyzed responses from 1,125 randomly selected parents with at least one child age 4-10 and found that 81% of parents agree that children today “are not grateful for what they have.”

As many as 42% of parents acknowledged they’re sometimes “embarrassed” by their children’s selfish actions.

Another 58% of parents “worry that they are giving their children too much,” the study reads.

Most parents in the study agreed it was possible to teach gratitude to their children and 76% of parents ranked the topic as a high priority. However, parents expressed different methods for lessons in thankfulness.

The most common way (88%) in which parents teach children to express gratitude is by encouraging them to say “please” and “thank you” or by writing handmade thank you cards. The study found that 60% of parents regularly give their children chores around the house. Other strategies used by parents were encouraging children to donate their toys and clothes to charity — with 13 % of parents even encouraging children to donate their own money.

The study concluded that parents were missing opportunities for teaching gratitude and emphasizing its differences from politeness.

“The most common strategy is having children say please and thank you on a regular basis. However, there is a difference between politeness and gratitude,” the study reads.

“To help children learn to be grateful, parents also need to emphasize why they are asking their child to say thanks. This can be as simple as taking time to say ‘thank you for…’ with a brief explanation.”

The study found that only one-quarter of parents say they regularly have their child send thank-you cards for birthday and holiday gifts which “may be a missed opportunity to help children learn gratitude.”

In a similar study from 2017, researchers found an association between harsh parenting and negative outcomes such as dropping out of school and becoming sexually active. Instead of expressing gratitude, children from households with harsh parents who engaged in yelling and verbal or physical threats of punishment were more likely to describe their friends as more important than obeying their parents. UPI

{Matzav.com}

4 COMMENTS

  1. After all the things that these children managed not to do for their parents, you would think that these parents would show a little gratitude and appreciation?! But no, they are an ungrateful lot. How selfish of these parents to respond negatively the way they did in this poll when their children do all that they can not to help them, thereby affording the parents the independence and self sufficiency that they desire?!

  2. Children today are spoiled brats because parents have no patience for them. Most mothers work and come home too tired and exhausted to educate their children or even to listen to them or talk to them when they come home from school. They expect the school to do the job of fully educating their children. Then the parents complain that children are ungrateful, chutzpahdig and ch”v go OTD. Sorry mothers and fathers, at 14 or even at 10 it’s too late to start educating your children. You have to do it when they’re 1 and be home at least 2 hours before your children come home.

  3. “One mother can take care of her 10 children until they grow up, but after she reaches old age, her 10 children quarrel amongst themselves over who will take care of her one and only mother. Why?”
    Lack of hakaras hatov r”l. It boils down to “what have you done for me lately”. I’ve got things to do and places to go. I’ve got life to enjoy. I’ve got new pleasures to explore. If it’s not inconvenient and I happen to be in your neighborhood, I’ll swing by and help. If I’m planning on leaving to Orlando tomorrow, I’m certainly not going to cancel my vacation to take care of you. You’re in your 80’s and fell? Call Hatzalah. What do you want from me? You ran out of milk? Call the neighbor. There’s a leak in the bathroom? Call a plumber. I can’t be bogged down with your problems. Let my brother/sister take you in. They’re nebachels anyway so it’s their responsibility. Let them worry about you. I’m too busy making money. I’ll try to come to the levaya and pick up my chelek of the yerusha. See yah.

  4. I’m not sure what the previous commenters (3) have in mind, but it seems to me that the only way to “teach” gratitude is to show gratitude yourself (maybe that’s what Kach Shomati means?). Statistically, it’s the only thing that works even a little. Even (maybe especially) showing gratitude to your kids helps. Giving chores is useless and a source of resentment, but if you profusely (and sincerely) thank a child for completing them, it will get you mileage.

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