Rav Moshe Elyashiv’s Lesson in Gratitude

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At a recent eirusin, Rav Moshe Elyashiv, the eldest son of Rav Yosef Sholom Elyashiv, was insistent that the kesubah reading should be given specifically to Ponevez president Rav Eliezer Kahaneman, grandson of Ponevez founder Rav Yosef Shlomo Kahaneman.

This happened at the eirusin of a son of Rav Dovid Miller, who serves as one of Ponevez’s roshei yeshiva.

“When the chosson was born,” Rav Moshe Elyashiv said, “his father wanted to honor my father, Rav Elyashiv, with sandekous. My father said in response: ‘Have you ever given this honor to the yeshiva president Rav Avrohom Kananeman? You must honor him with the sandekous because he is the president of the yeshiva where you teach. People must be grateful. I forbid you to honor anyone else.’

“Now, at the eirusin of this chosson, can I disobey my father’s command and accept the kesubah reading?” Rav Moshe Elyashiv said. “As a show of gratitude, Rav Dovid must specifically honor the yeshiva president, the sandek’s son.

{Matzav.com Israel News Bureau}


  1. The mitzvah of kibbud av was THEN at the time of sandeko’us. As a show of gratitude, Rav Eliyashiv zt”l wanted to honor the President THEN. But that does not mean he must continue giving him the honor on every occasion. He’s not disobeying his father by not honoring the president again.

  2. they do in the gemara, and all throughout rishonim and acharonim. whos we? and who says that we are dealing with psak? why did you feel the need to shed light on the world in the form of your post? i reread it a few times bc i couldnt believe someone would actually feel that all the world was missing was such a comment. I daven for people like you every day….


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