Harav Yaakov Bender, Rosh HaYeshiva of Yeshiva Darchei Torah in Far Rockaway, issued a heartfelt letter to parents of his yeshiva addressing the increasingly troubling trend of boys collecting money on Purim for extravagant prizes, associated with organizations they know little about.
Rav Bender begins his letter by acknowledging the widespread tradition of children collecting for charitable causes during Purim, a practice he has long encouraged in his Yeshiva. “Every Purim, many children of all stripes and ages come to our home. The boys are often collecting for some cause or another, and I am more than happy to give them $5 or $10 each, aside from some of the major campaigns,” he writes.
He reflects on how, in previous years, his Yeshiva students would feel the pain of others and raise funds to alleviate the burdens of their fellow Yidden. “One of those ways is to raise money for the indigent and poor,” Rav Bender explains. “I felt honored to be part of a Yeshiva where hundreds of talmidim are out there every Purim helping others. Not only that, but the children themselves felt good to help others.”
However, this year, Rav Bender was shocked by the nature of some of the collections. “Lo and behold, this year, more boys visited than ever, despite the short day. As always, I asked them for whom they were collecting. Many of the children answered with the names of an organization with which I was not familiar. I asked the children what the organization does; not a single child knew.”
Things took a more alarming turn when Rav Bender’s child brought home glossy booklets from one of these organizations. “I was stunned. Basically, children were promised prizes worth nearly 45% of the amount collected, or even more!” he writes.
Rav Bender then contrasts these new incentives with the more modest prizes of the past. “For many decades, Klal Yisroel has incentivized children to collect, but the prizes were minimal—to thank them for their work. I remember, as a little child, being asked to collect for Chinuch Atzmai. Sure, we ultimately got a prize—but Chinuch Atzmai representatives went around to all the classes explaining what the organization did. We felt part of a sacred mission: to help Klal Yisroel build Torah in Eretz Yisroel.”
He also references his own Yeshiva’s fundraising efforts, noting that they offer small incentive prizes for their annual Bike-a-thon campaign, which cost only a small fraction of the amount collected. “In terms of our Yeshiva, every spring, as part of our highly successful Bike-a-thon campaign, we include incentive prizes that cost a small fraction of the amount collected.”
The letter continues with an incredulous tone as Rav Bender details the kinds of prizes being offered. “It seemed that these children were in essence collecting for themselves—e.g., if a child collected $650, he would receive a beautiful, expensive, electric scooter.” He further questions the wisdom of such prizes, saying, “Agav, why would any parent allow their child to drive an electric, high-speed scooter? It is beyond my understanding.”
Rav Bender strongly condemns the nature of these new collections, calling them “terrible types of collections.” He adds, “To me, such an organization seems fishy.”
Importantly, Rav Bender makes it clear that his message is not against children collecting for worthy causes, but rather against the increasingly self-serving nature of these campaigns. “I want to emphasize that this is not an ‘anti-kids-collecting’ message. On the contrary, how great it is to instill the proper chinuch in children, to walk outside their own daled amos, raising funds to help others!”
Rav Bender reflects on the values instilled in the students of his Yeshiva, citing how his older students dedicate their time selflessly to raise over half a million dollars annually for individuals in real need. “Our older bachurim gave away their Purim, once again, to raise over half a million dollars for total strangers, local families and individuals in real need—all without one penny of incentives. Ashreihem.”
He concludes his letter with a call to action for parents and educators to avoid fostering greed in children. “Our job as parents and mechanchim is to imbue middos tovos; not to teach our children to be greedy and busy with themselves.”
{Matzav.com}
Nothing new here. Drivers take meshulachim around for a steep cut in the collected funds.
I’m saddened that Rav Bender didn’t state the obvious. Purim is an immensely holy time. The depths of golus contains the seeds of geula. We access this through fulfilling the Mitzvos of the day. And we know the four Mitzvos of the day. Collecting tzedokoh is NOT one of those Mitzvos. Collecting for Yeshivos, and various organizations can be a wonderful thing. But it is tzedokoh, not Purim.
Once the collecting becomes a challenge, there is a serious risk. Kids who are so pressured that they prioritize the collecting. I have observed kids pursuing their fundraising, at the expense of fulfilling the Mitzvos of seuda and Mishloach Manos. Even worse is that those who sent the kids on the collecting mission did not teach them the need to prioritize the Mitzvos of Purim.
What is the mission of chinuch for Purim? When we start that dialog, the issue of expensive incentives will be easier to resolve.
The results of the last U.S presidential election was supposed to be about the return of common sense to American culture. Sadly, our little corner of the Jewish world still needs to await the same. While Rabbi Bender condemns collecting for what he calls “fishy” organizations, he states that he is supportive of the concept of instilling chincuch in older bachurim and teaching them the importance of raising moneys for those in need.
Yes, well, maybe. I may be cynical, but I get the feeling that the lessons imbibed by those bochurim as they visit the ostentatious McMansions that have unfortunately proliferated our spiritual landscape is not caring for other people, but rather the specious value of the accretion of wealth by any means necessary. If the lesson plan is to teach gemilas chasudim, then I’m sorry to say, Boys Scouts of America, lehavdil, does a better job. When was the last time one would see a bochur noticing an elderly person struggling to cross the street and offer assistance? As a septuagenarian myself, I have been subject to considerable neglect from those who have been commanded, “lo suchal l’hisalaim”. And when I finally get to shul, I am assaulted by the barrage of young men who embarrass me by asking for money that I don’t have. Did it ever occur to anyone that old people on social security don’t generally have discretionary income?
As for allowing small children unaccompanied by an adult to go collecting door to door to approach unknown occupants of random houses, don’t get me started on that. What do the parents of those kids have between their ears? Certainly not brains. What could possibly go wrong, right? If tragedy should strike, Chas Vesholam, don’t worry. Lipa will compose a beautiful poignant song.
Finally, under no circumstances should Yeshivas allow underage children to collect tzedakah. Besides violating the requirements for the collection of Tzedakah according to Shulkhan Arukh, Hilchpos Tzedakah (nigvas beshnayim, mechalekes beshlosho), one of the first Talmudic studies presented in Yeshiva is Perek Hakonais, where we learned that placing something in the care of a Koton, a minor, constitutes peshiyah, negligence, for which the adult is responsible. When ones gives tzedokah money to a child and that money for some reason does not reach the intended party, the donor is responsible to replace that donation. But how is the donor supposed to know? It seems to me to be a clear violation of lifneh eever. (Of course, one might be able to suggest all sort of lomdus, It isn’t lifneh eever, because it isn’t betray ibre d’neharah. Or the donor, being aware of the consequences will always make sure that the donation is given conditionally, that if the money does not arrive then the it is gift to the child, and if the child loses the money than it wasn’t tzehadkah in the first place. If it is lady of the house who is the donor, surely she is familiar with the concept of “Tnai Koful”, or what have you. Right. But in the final analysis, is this the right thing to do l’katchilah?)
I have a suggestion to Rabbi Bender. Being that he is the founder of Hatzakah of Far Rockaway and the Five Towns, as well as the Rosh Yeshivah of Darkei Torah, would it not be a good idea to send children on Hatzalah calls? After all what can be better than to be Mechanach our children with the great Mitzvah of Hatzahlas Nefoshes?. The fact that children don’t have proper training should not deter us. Children don’t have the foggiest idea about the proper way to collect tzedskah and that does not stop us.