Report: Charedi Girls Paid Not to Wear Makeup at their Weddings

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makeupThe following report appears on the website of Yediot Achronot. We point out that the practice mentioned in the article, according to the understanding of many, is contrary to proper hanhaga as mentioned in the Gemara and other Torah sources. We report the story here to highlight the need for the rational, Torah-true voices among us to be heard and not allow others to implement practices that are not only not stringencies, but fly in the face of halacha and that which has been practiced for millenia.

The Darchei Rachel seminary for girls in Jerusalem imposed a new regulation recently: Each girl agreeing not to put on makeup for her wedding will receive a scholarship worth NIS 1,000 (about $265).

 Moshe, whose sister studies at Darchei Rachel, says the new plan was initiated by the institution following a rise in the use of makeup among ultra-Orthodox girls. According to Moshe, before their wedding the girls are exempted from the school’s strict rules, leading many brides to put on heavy makeup.

The managers of the seminary, which is considered one of the most conservative education institutions in the ultra-Orthodox sector and has about 1,500 students, took notice of the trend and decided to try and change it.

A source in the institution reported of a partial response to the scholarship, adding that not enough girls have gotten married yet in order to thoroughly examine the response.

A haredi education official explains, “This education institution is for the sector’s most righteous girls, who are strict about everything. However, I remain skeptical in regards to the initiative’s success, in light of the fact that makeup is acceptable in the haredi society and because it’s a particularly exciting day.”

{Ynet/Yair Alpert-Matzav.com Newscenter}


36 COMMENTS

  1. .. not allow others to implement practices that are not only not stringencies, but fly in the face of halacha and that which has been practiced for millenia.

    What a strange thing to say.
    Makeup, when worn for millenia, was to be pretty inside one’s home, not outside, and I’m sure was with good taste as well, and not overdone as in the case in today’s times. We may not agree with certain issues with the very chareidi Jews in Eretz Yisroel, but how can we criticize them for chumros in tznius, when there is so much we can learn from them in this area.
    Sounds like a case of sour grapes to me.

  2. Your introductory comment says it all!

    This is kineged Torah.

    HKB”H Himself adorned the first Kallah – Chavah.

    Which “posek” did these people consult to establish this Minhag Shtuss??

    Hashem Yishmor!

  3. Its sad to see that the Muslim world is having such a bad influence on the ‘righteous’ amongst us. In volume two of the sefer Sheivet Mussar writes explicitly that women should do the things that women do to attract their husbands to them. In fact, he writes that not performing these practices are grounds for divorce. What has this generation come to? Are we so bored that we have nothing to do but compose our own Torah! What is wrong with the Torah that G-d gave at Sinai and taught t us by our revered master Moishe Rabbeinu. Zos HaTorah Lo Tehei Muchlefes V’lo Thei Torah Acheres Mei’ais Haboreh Boruch Hu, (from the 13 tenets of faith of the Rambam)

  4. Your opening paragraph couldnt have said it better but these are probably the same group of people who bow to the arabs so who cares

  5. In Yeshaya Perek 3 posuk 16 it says that eye makeup is an abomination to Hashem and one of the causes of Golus. I have heard from a Rov using this posuk as a mekor that it is ossur to wear eye make up . I have since heard from one lady that it means only eye shadow and from somone else only eye liner. I say if not wearing makeup will bring the Geulah closer – please chuck away your makeup!

  6. Ribono shel Olam, what happened to ??? ?? ???? ???? ????… ?????? ?????? Even about kallahs the gemara says ?? ??? ??? ??? ??? ?????? ????? ??. Makeup is allowed only at home, unless it looks natural. See sefer ??? ???? ?????.

  7. “Makeup and perfume is intended to beautify a wife for her husband, beyond this it should be used scarcely if at all.”

    Tanchuma Vayishlach Piskah 5 (Cited in Women & the Mitzvot Vol. 2, The Modest Way, by Rabbi Getsel Ellinson, page 80).

  8. In Yeshaya Perek 3 posuk 16 it says that eye makeup is an abomination to Hashem and one of the causes of Golus. I have heard from a Rov using this posuk as a mekor that it is ossur to wear eye make up . I have since heard from one lady that it means only eye shadow and from somone else only eye liner. I say if not wearing makeup will bring the Geulah closer – please chuck away your makeup

  9. 1. What is the source of this article? Has anyone confirmed this article to 100% accurate? Perhaps the article is misleading or based on hearsay. Can someone confirm the report?

    2. Assuming that the article is 100% accurate it needs to be clarified if any Gedolim were consulted on this issue. It does sound EXTREMELY bizarre being that it DEFINITELY goes against Halacha (See Gemorah Kedushin for example) and the words I’ve personally heard from very big Tamidei Chochomim. It is VITALLY important that a woman look beautiful for her husband. All the more so on her wedding day! Can you imagine a chason going to b’dekin and getting turned off by his pale faced kalah?!

  10. what kind of high school is Darcei Rochel, I never heard of it.
    I personally feel that they should teach the girls to wear the makeup in the home, and do it naturally as opposed to putting it on special for the street.
    makeup on a wedding day is a very positive attribute, our grandmothers way back in Hungary wouldn’t dare go to the chuppah without!!!!!!!!

  11. Those of you that come from observant Jewish homes, who have family traditions, who have Rabbeim and Roshei Yeshiva who gave them a mesora, please don’t scorn those that raised you. The idea that women only wore makeup- not crazy-woman-applied-with-a-trowel-makeup, just normal looking-good-covering-blemishes-and enhancing-a-look-of-health-makeup- at home is so abnormal that it doesn’t deserve attention. It’s not a long trip from here to burkas like the women in Beit Shemesh. This is another example of kashim….kesapachas.

  12. Maybe the gemara that says that bnos yisrael are beautiful but were made ugly by poverty is meant to be a good thing. It sure seems to be the norm in Meah She’arim where it seems that most of the women are machmir in menavlasam.

  13. In non-frum (and non-Jewish) weddings it is not at all uncommon for the groom and other male members of the wedding party to wear some makeup, so as to come out better in the pictures and videos. In fact, it is the norm.

    Why don’t the frum chassanim? It would make the pictures come out better. Because in our circles, we don’t consider it appropriate or necessary for the face of the chassan to be enhanced. If the picture does not come out looking like he is in real life, so what. You can agree or disagree, and if you disagree you can feel free to do differently. It is not halacha that he cannot wear makeup for this purpose.

  14. Interesting that this is the school’s rules, so they want them to comply out of school. IMO cosmetics at a certain age is perfectly reasonable. It is also reasonable for school’s to set strict rules as it can be difficult to enforce allowing the use of some cosmetics and not others. However, this is not junior high school, this is for girls of kallah age, so I don’t quite get this.

    Unless, and this is the only logical explanation, the hanhala – and presumably the parent body – feel that makeup under ANY circumstances, no matter how subtle and tasteful, is inappropriate, b’shita and b’mesorah. In which case, why is it necessary to pay the girls, and what are the mekoros?

  15. For the record, I don’t see what the big deal is. Speaking only about frum weddings, I can say with certainty that roughly 50% or less of people wear makeup to their own wedding. If the number goes up a little, so what?

  16. To Gitty, #19
    I wouldn’t be so sure that it’s not Beged Isha.
    Seriously. I would ask a rav and not just assume that doing something fully for a woman would be ok for a man to do.
    Many men do not groom their hair in ways that women do (just as fixing their eyebrows even if their eyebrows grow in funny), so why would makeup be ok? I don’t know either way, but I would ask.

  17. #13 what book? Yeshaya? Gemara? Oz Vehadar Levusha? Why is it not accepted? Because it has some inconvenient truths or because it was disproven?

    Can anyone cite a halacha permitting women to go out in the steet (or even a kallah when seen by strange men) wearing makeup that doesn’t look natural? When it comes to halacha I don’t care for anyone’s personal opinion. Thank you.

  18. And to #10 and #11, I’m not sure that is the case for today. I’ve seen choshuve rebbetzins whose husbands are noted talmidei chachomim wearing noticeable makeup outside their home.
    I don’t think that applies the same way nowadays, but that too you can ask a rav.
    Makeup doesn’t have to be like a clown, but it does enhance the looks of people, especially those who are very pale-skinned.

  19. I promise in 20 years people will say that is “Torah Judaism” and anyone who disagrees is an apikorus and this is how things were down all the way back to Moshe Rabbeinu. Hashem Yirachem.

  20. don’t want to take this discussion in the wrong direction but many women wear make-up ONLY OUT the house (disregarding the pain it causes to their husbands)

  21. We need to start learning torah and not letting trhese NUTS run the world and represent us
    We NEED GEDOLEI Yisroel to stand up and SCREAM.
    What happened to ‘shema Tisganeh al baalah”?!
    Gevlat you think its only at home
    aishes rabbi akiva walked the streets to meet her husband all dressed up!
    LEARN a bit

    we need to be TERRIFIED of what will happen to the Neshamos of our most precious yungerleit if their wives are ugly in their eyes!!

  22. #24 I’ve seen choshuve rebbetzins whose husbands are noted talmidei chachomim speaking lashon hara. That doesn’t make it right.

    “Makeup does enhance the looks of people…”

    So do short and immodest clothing.

    C’mon, yeshivaleit, wake up. The matzav in tznius is pretty bad. Es past nisht for “choshuve rebbetzins whose husbands are noted talmidei chachomim” to be dressed almost like shiksas r”l.

  23. to AA
    Makeup is an obvious thing- if a posek’s wife wears it, then it means she planned on wearing it and it’s ok. You can never compare loshon hara which a person gets tripped up by and doesn’t plan to speak, than something that’s a derech of someone’s life.
    I wouldn’t compare makeup which is perfectly kosher (within limits) to short clothes!!! One is halacha and one is a chumra. Yes, we have a lot to learn but don’t push your chumras on others.

    Oz V’hadar levusha is a wonderful sefer but it’s not the only psak halacha.
    As in anything, ask your own posek and don’t use Matzav or any website instead.

    We live in a scary world that the women have to go out of their way to look nice for their husbands as #27 said, but I don’t think the husbands want their lives looking like nebach cases in the streets or at a chasunah.

  24. When my wife doesn’t wear makeup, even out of the house,

    you can bet I’ll know what my friend’s wife is wearing.

    Sorry, I’m a man.

  25. it is told that rav shimon schwabb was asked to give a drasha on tznius – his response was “for a young rov to give a drasha on tzniyus is itself not tzniyus” by the same token this discussion itself lacks in tzniyus

  26. It won’t work.
    My daughter graduated from this seminary- many of the teachers wear tasteful makeup out of school, and so does my daughter. This is not an extreme seminary. Not many girls will agree to not wear makeup just for the money- Only if a girl doesn’t wear makeup anyways, she will benefit from this money.
    It’s up to all of us mothers and teachers to teach our daughters what “tasteful makeup” really is. It’s a Mitzva for a woman to make herself beautiful, and makeup has been used from the time of the Nevi’im.

  27. honestly – I dont claim to have any rayos on this issue..ive seen not one valid mekor quoted here(we dont learn halachos from navi directly) – where does the oz vehadar levushah say this? he often says things that are mussar or aitzos tovos in tznius, not just the bare bones halachos, so one needs to know what he is saying when he says his psak – also, do we have any other teshuvos on this inyan? does it really matter what opinions we have without sources, just plain svaros? why do we continually feel the need to ‘express’ our opinion when these are issues best left to gedolei torah?

    the gemora in kesuvos says that there is a de’ah that one is allowed to look at a kallah ‘keday lecavavah al leiv baalah’, the gemora concludes ‘velais hilchasa cevasay’, that the halacha is not like this – one may not violate lo sasuru here, or anywhere else where it is forbidden.

    There was a poster above who admitted to being oiver on lo sachmod and lo sasuru – azoi shtait chazal: ‘hamistakel beishah keday lehanos memenah, afilu im yish beyado torah umaasim tovim, lo yinakeh medina shel gehinnom’, The mishnah berurah brings this and says that kulai alma lo peligi, according to every achron, every rishon, one may not look and that it is a deoraysoh.
    mixed in with that evil is a spark of truth – it is a davar yeduah that a lady should look nice for her husband, that any ‘genus’ is considered a wrong thing for her to do – being machmir on someone else’s cheshbon does not fly – of course, this does not justify violating actual halacha.

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