The Matzav Shmoooze: $21,000 for Misery?

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yerushalayimDear readers,

I just got off the phone from a two-hour conversation with my daughter who is in seminary in Eretz Yisroel. Yes, you guessed it. “But I am soooo homesick… I can’t do this for another day (let alone another nine months). Why did I do this to myself?”

At the start of the conversation, I needed to bite my lip and hold myself back from blurting out the words, “I told you so.”

I am not here to bash the whole going-to-Eretz-Yisroel thing (even though I think it is ridiculous). I just don’t understand why it became something that my daughter only did because it’s “the in thing.” And we needed to give in because of the lack of good options here in New York. I mean starting from the fortune of money it costs (not just tuition, but all that spending money and plane tickets), to the fact that most of the girls spend 3/4 of the year just getting used to it, I just don’t understand how we let this happen.

My wife and I, who gave in to our daughter’s begging and let her go, are now going to have to spend possibly the rest of the year worrying. Not a bad deal, huh? $21,000 for our daughter to be miserable and for us to constantly worry. Amazing.

I think it is time our community provides an in-town option with all the benefits that the Eretz Yisroel seminary “experience” has to offer, because we have four more daughters after this one, and if we would have an option of this sort, they will absolutely not go to Israel for seminary.

Ari

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The Matzav Shmoooze is a regular feature on Matzav.com that allows all readers to share a thought or analysis, long or short, one sentence or several paragraphs long, on any topic, for readers to mull over and comment on. Email submissions to [email protected].

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91 COMMENTS

  1. Listen part of the seminary “experience” is learning how to go thru hardships in life.
    She will just come out emotionally stronger after the year

  2. I would like to respond to this. Has your daughter ever been away from home? Has she gone to sleep away camp? If you had an inkling that going away would be an issue for her -you should have put your foot down and said as parents we really feel this is not for you. I do feel that going away helps the young lady grow up, learn to live with new experiences etc. Talk to her teachers and get her used to the idea this was your choice please deal with it. When she comes home and starts dating you will want her to one day get engaged stay engaged , married and deal with what comes up. And not to throw the towel in saying its to hard I changed my mind. So my thoughts are be positve with her and get her to see this is what she chose. With your other daughter- well there are plenty choices in New York and out of town so there are plenty of choices just seek them out. Gut yom tov

  3. Believe me, I wish there were more American options. There is a wonderful new seminary that is only 12 hours a week! (Much less than the half day sem I went to.) And no dorm. What are out of towners to do?

    That said, my kids never went through that. Something vaguely resembling that kind of homesickness kicked in during the winter doldrums when other parents came. But for the most part, my kids were too busy being grateful for the exceptional opportunity we gave them, and taking advantage of it.

  4. Part of going off to Eretz Yisroel is letting go and not being so attached to home being independent.
    So when she gets married she wont call you and say why did I do this I am so home sick .I hope then you won’t wonder why did I let her get married just like you are doing right now.

  5. I can imagine that this is very rough…on her and you! I highly recommend supporting her, letting her know you love her, but also reminding her to look for the good and positive parts of the year. I’ve worked in chinuch for many years and have sent hundreds of ‘daughters’ to seminary. For some (and not the majority, just some) the beginning is VERY VERY hard. I can tell you from experience that the girls who ‘stuck it out’ are so grateful that they did. In addition, knowing that your daughter is the homesick type, wouldn’t you rather her struggle with that now than as a kallah? I know it’s hard!! Probaboly harder on you than her, but you both should try to keep your chins up and support push through this! Hatzlacha and Ksiva Vachasima Tova!

  6. “And we needed to give in because of the lack of good options here in New York.”

    Huh?!?

    You didn’t need to give in. How about taking responsibility for your own decision?

    There happen to be plenty of great options in the US. Brooklyn, Clevelend, Montreal and Baltimore have excellent seminaries. There’s a new one in Lakewood that started this year.

  7. i totally agree. my daughter just finished that year. i have more daughters and i absolutly do not want to send them. need good option here.

  8. Dear Ari,
    Although I feel for your daughter and for your situation position as a parent. While reading your schmooze I could not help but wonder how much support you gave your daughter with this decision. You obviously do not value a year of learning in Eretz Yisrael as you are looking for another option locally. But that other option is not learning and connecting with Eretz Yisrael.
    When my 3 older children applied to yeshivot and seminaries, I made sure that beore they made their decisions they actually visit the mosdot and spend a day in each place. A year is a long time. You need to know what you are “purchasing”. Did you ask your daughter what she was looking to gain or achieve in this year. If this is a maturity issue then you as parents need to have stepped in and help your daughter make an appropriate decision. It seems to me that not only is there a breakdown in vlues in your family but quite alot of disfunction. This is not about “I told you so”!
    This is about your role as parents inculcating Ahavas Hatorah and Ahavas Eretz Yisroel one of the most basic tennets of Yahadus. I believe if you as a parent really care you will do the most to help your daughter make the most of this wonderful opportunity that you have given her.

  9. No one told you to send your daughter to Israel, just because its the ‘done thing’. Girls who go are expected to be ready to live life away from home while gaining insights to life which will help them become better wives and mothers. If your daughter wasn’t ready, you shouldn’t have sent her. Don’t blame the system because you didn’t prepare her correctly.

    As for replacing the Israel experience with something in NY, that’s the classic mistake Jews have been making for thousands of years, trying to replicate Israel with something in Chutz L’Aretz. Our complacently in Galus is appalling. There’s no reason we shouldn’t give our children the chance to experience their homeland in a Torah true environment. Girls who go to Israel reconnect with their heritage in a way you can never offer in NY.

    That doesn’t mean everyone has to go to Israel, but the system is there and has been working for our bochrim and seminary girls for the last bunch of years.

  10. Where do you live that you have no in town options? There are plenty of great seminaries in NY, NJ, Cleveland and other places. Think before you leap.

  11. I really feel for you we had the same situation with our oldest daughter. Our next one went to a local sem. here in brooklyn. For our 12th grader we are looking into a new seminary opening next year in brooklyn, it is being run by R’ Assaf, and Bella Weinreb (two amazing people) and is supposed to be unreal. So i guess they agree with you that we need a in town option that gives the girls a great experience. Hatzlacha Rabba with your daughter.

  12. You don’t have to cave into the pressure, I didn’t. Noone is forcing you to let her go…my daughter spent her seminary year here and it was fine, why do we have to always look over our shoulders to what others are doing? Even though the local options are not amazing they can be fine enough…meanwhile I am sure she will learn to enjoy, beginnings are always hard.

  13. Give her a few weeks and she will love it!

    Are you so narrow sighted that some homesickness in the first 2 weeks makes you think she will be miserable for the whole year??

    Everyone is homesick the first time away from home. It’s good for her – will help her grow up.

    Do you want the first time she’s away from home to be when she’s married and then she will have her homesickness then?? Let go of the apron strings and she will have a great year!!

  14. not your daughter, YOU!!
    shes been there, what 8 days, and is homesick. SO what? SYmpathize and go on..
    in June she’ll be crying that she doesnt want to leave.
    Get over it.

  15. Grow up and do what is best for your daughter and family (I think generally dealing with moving away from home is a good thing, Shes homesick now after leaving her family for a month, arent you worried what she’ll be like when she leaves for good in the not to distant future) At any rate do whats best for your family an ddaughter, not what other people do.

  16. The whole thing is crazy
    ALL the seminary owners are quite well off
    While parents struggle to pay for this nonsense
    Any reason they will offer as to why the girls should go
    Pales to the financial misery parents endure.
    Interesting enough plenty of tosh yeshivas did not send their daughtersv
    And they all married well.
    I learned in rests Yisroel
    The girls are wandering the streets all afternoon
    Is that normal? They become slaves to other women around Tom tov
    Time “doing chesed” all the Israelis laugh at them
    It’s the biggest joke.
    Then begging for meals on shabbos
    Yeah sure it’s for “the experience” nonsense it saves the schools thousands of dollars is this right? Please if any one would see what goes on there you would never send your girls

  17. Actually, I think it was money well-spent. Your daughter is going to have to grow up sometime and get over the fact that her parents won’t always be with her wherever she goes.

  18. The author is right but apparently (as he seems to admit) not too smart. There is a lot of people making a lot of money from a lot of misery because “Stupid is as stupid does”.

  19. This is normal in the beginning. Once starts making friends she will get over it. Why are you constantly worrying though? The crime rate in Israel is nothing compared to American cities.

  20. Too bad for you that you gave into this pressure altogether. Guess what? My daughter didn’t even go to Seminary and is married BH and doing just wonderful yes, without, and I repeat WITHOUT seminary. Then I have another daughter who insisted on Seminary and went locally. Mothers and Fathers: if you don’t want to send your daughters away, then put your foot down and keep them locally.

  21. I remember once shopping in Har Nof right before Succos and being struck at how home sick and miserable some of the girls looked.That said most girls get over their home sickness and seminary is very good for a girl to learn independence.And odd as it might sound, in a seminary context, being away from where she grew up also exposes her more “to the real world”.

  22. You can’t replace the eretz Yisroel experience. Their is so much to gain. Why deprive a child to going and seeing what real life is all about? Why deprive a child to seeing yidden living a life of Torah and mitzvas without these American luxerious? Their isn’t a greater simchas hachayim than these people in living in eretz Yisroel. This is the way we lived thousands of years it’s the real yidishkeit. So your going to spoil your kids life for a couple of bucks ? Hashem yishmor

  23. There are plenty of seminaries here and your daughters can begin their secular higher education and be ahead of her Israel going peers.

  24. I would assume, please correct me if I’m wrong, that your daughter has not been there for more than a couple of weeks. That is far different from taking “3/4 of the year to get used to it”. It does take time. Plus, this time of year is very difficult for those who are used to being home for YT. My first weeks in yeshiva were difficult and the pressures of the Chagim did not make it any easier. And that was with knowing that I would be in yeshiva for Rosh Hashana,Yom Kippur, and the second days of Sukkos.

  25. I don’t think it’s possible to provide an equivalent experience in New York, one with all the “benefits”. The chareidi community in E”Y is just not the same as in New York or Lakewood. E”Y itself is not the same as NY or NJ. Being away from home and in a new experience provides the opportunity for growth in a way that staying close to home doesn’t. Now I’m not saying that going to E”Y is right for every girl, but don’t pretend that you can provide the same experience in America. You can’t.
    And don’t worry, I guarantee (You hear that? Guarantee.) that in 6 or 7 weeks from now, your daughter will sound very different. Getting used to new situations takes time and this is a very new situation. Give it some time.

  26. You are looking for sympathy because you couldn’t say no to your daughter? If you couldn’t afford it or did not want your daughter going just say no. If you are giving in because everyone else is doing it or because it is “the in thing” I have a simple idea – just stop trying to keep up with the Cohen’s or the Goldberg’s. Be happy satisfied with what you have and don’t worry about the in thing.

  27. She will overcome the home sickness – and she will grow in ways you never thought possible – but no one should do something because it is in – that’s something she learnt at home – and hopefully will unlearn it in E”Y.
    Hatzlacha.

  28. I have already sent 2 daughters to seminary and they were both different girls (for the better!) when they returned. They came back with extremely different experiences since the 2 of them are like night and day (and that’s an understatement).
    What I’d like to say to Ari is that it’s normal for some (or probably most) girls to be homesick in the beginning. They know it and expect it.
    It’s a growing experience and by the time they leave they are crying too- they don’t want to come home.
    It’s a year of growing up and cutting the umbilical chord, which gives them the maturity to leave their home and build a life of their own.
    Your words make it seem that you didn’t send her off with a positive attitude and it seems you wish to vindicate your thoughts. Do you want her to be miserable just prove yourself correct?
    Give her the chizuk she needs and comfort her with “Kol haschalos kashos”. She’ll get chizuk from the seminary staff too, but if you tell her, “I told you so!” then it will be a self fulfilling prophecy.
    I wouldn’t change my daughters’ seminary experiences for anything, and I was one of the skeptical ones. And yes we are still ‘broke’ financially from sending them but we are thrilled with the results, even if they each had difficult beginnings in different ways.
    Encourage her and tell her that she’ll love it, but just to give it some time. Speak to her eim habayis and find out if it’s within normal range of her anxieties. If so, give her space.
    Wishing you hatzlocha that she experience a year of growth and happiness (and that she disproves you 🙂

  29. I don’t understand, first you wrote you let your daughter go to eretz yisrael because its “the in thing” (a chisaron on your part), then you agreed that there is no better option.
    Secondly, your daughter is only there for less then a month, where do you get your information from, that girls take 3/4 of a year getting used to it? And if you think that the statistic is really true (which its not!) then YOU are the one who should never have let it happen. The question should only be on you and your wife, not we.

  30. Ari, you are a very weak person with an unusuall low self esteem! My question is, how did a fool like you, get that kind of money to throw around? There are many choices for seminary, right here in Brooklyn. Of course you couldn’t say no to your Tie’erah “jap” daughter!

  31. Hang in there, most girls find that Chanukah is a turning point. Right now with the Yomim Tovim it’s a particularly hard time for the girls to be away from home, between arranging davening and seudos etc. But- as one who went to sem in E.Y., taught in sem both in E.Y.and outside of E.Y., sent four daughters, at great financial hardship (we are both in chinuch) and as one who has been involved in twelfth grade sem placements, there are excellent seminaries on these shores, but Yerushalayim simply can not be duplicated, nor can the toshvei Yerushalayim, or Bnei Braq or Kiryat Sefer etc. etc. That being said, it is not for every girl and going (or doing anything for that matter,) just because it”s the “in” thing when it’s not the best option for a particular girl is not only a waste of money, it can be downright dangerous.

  32. With this $21,000 your daughter will grow up.
    Because in Eretz Yisrael you learn about who you are not because its the in thing.

  33. I hear what you’re saying but you’re up against thousands of girls who have thrived there.

    A lot of things in life are not for everyone as a Klal.

    Hatzlacha.

  34. my years in seminary were the best 2 years of growth for me. a lot of girls start off miserable and end up loving it– and growing a lot from sem. be patient. its esp. stressful before the yom toviim with making meal arrangments– just be supportive!

  35. FIRST OF ALL AS IT IS ONLY SEPT YOU CAN GET BACK SOME OF YOUR MONEY IM SURE
    AS FAR AS BEING THE IN THING WHY STOP HERE

    SO THERE ARE MANY THINGS THAT ARE BEING DONE BY MOST OF THE OILAM

    A PERSON HAS TO BE PART OF THE TZIBUR BUT NOT NECC DOING EVERYTHING LIKE THE TZIBUR

  36. this is not unusual, you have to give it until Chanuka that is when it usually turns around. Thi is exactly what happened with my daughter and she ended up having an amazing year in Eretz Yisroel

  37. I went for 2 years and – lets just say that 95% of mothers get that call – and by the end of the year 95% want to stay for another year.
    It does take a while to get used to, but thats part of the growing and part of the whole expeirience. I almost miss that feeling of “I wanna go home right now” that I felt at the begining.
    So, yeh you wonder why you bothered and I bet that she is too but just encourage her to enjoy herself and stick it out.
    Hatzlocha!

  38. true, the kids should not come here for only seminary or yeshiva.
    All the Yidden should come to live in Eretz Israel and stop thinking that Amerika is the promised land!

  39. You are correct! sending you child to Eretz Yisroel for sem only bec its the “in” thing is ridiculous. However there are many good seminaries right here in the U.S. and Canada. Brooklyn has Beis Yaakov and Sara Shnierer, Lakewood has 2 seminaries, Toronto has one,Montreal has one, Cleveland has a sem etc.
    If we wouldn’t fall prey to what “others” will say, and trying to keep up with the joneses for all types of silly reasons we’d all be better off!!

  40. I for one think it would be best if there was a trial and warranty policy. If your daughter’s unhappy after a month, you could take her home and get your money back for the rest of the year. The first month should be the trial period. Thee’s alot to gain from sending our daughters to Eretz Yisroel. Besides the haluchis and nice hashkufis they pick up. There’s the seeing how alot of people in Eretz Yisroel are mistapik bimuit- live with alot less. We are so spoiled in here America. It’s good for our kids to see that you could be happy eventhough your living with alot less. So many people never get this lesson. It’s from the best lessons in life. Now of course there are alot of girls, who just don’t go with this intention and never end up learning this. And only go to be in with the crowd. And even then leave with nothing of this sort having been learned. But if you know your daughter and she could possibly gain this beneficial lesson. Then it’s worth sending her.

  41. Trust me – if you and your wife don’t get in the way, this $21,000 will be the best chinuch bargain you’ll ever have in your life. For only $21,000 your daughter will learn important life-lessons that she never could while hanging on to her mother’s apron strings for dear life. He daddy won’t be there to fix her every problem and wipe the tears off her cheeks.

    Trust me, by the time she’s halfway through the year and learned to deal with her problems so that she can get married and raise a healthy family without turning to you at every crisis to bail her out, you’ll agree that this was money well-spent.

    Of course, if you and Mommy continue to indulge her and tell her how wonderful she is and what a victim she is, you’ll have wasted every penny of the sem tuition and deprived her of an awesome chinuch.

  42. Sending girls to “Israel” for a “year” is a total waste of Yiddisha gelt! How can one justify spending $21,000.00? After being married for a number of years, does it realy make the slightest difference? Raising children, changing diapers, preparing for Yom Tov, baking challos, doing laundry, being up a whole night with a sick child etc… won’t matter that you “studied” in “Israel”! The Ruchnius in the home is the Achrayus of the husband!

  43. Hum, 5 daughters @21G (it’s really alot more…)
    Now how could we have helped some oram’lite with that?

    Or maybe, instead of spending 80G on her wedding, spend 100!

    No, I don’t think Sara Shnirer had this in mind.

  44. i have been in chinuch for many years. i can for sure tell you that girls from US and canada seminaries are better trained moros and are more matzliach in teaching.

  45. she will love it . this will be THE BEST YEAR OF HER LIFE. ignore her when she says she’s homesick . in one more week she’ll come aroung i guarantee it

  46. That;s why Toronto is an option for in towners and out of towners- i know many girls that had a great year and came back “practically inspired”-(for those that understand) more than those coming back from Eretz Yisrael

  47. This is obviously your first daughter. Almost every parent gets that phone call. But unless your daughter is less mature and capable than 95% of the girls this will pass quickly and she’ll do well. I have a daughter in seminary now who already says she’s doing great. If there is a group we should stop sending to Israel, it is our boys. No one says anything about funding many years of post-high school learning for them, but girls, it seems, are not worth the money. They should just start earning money so the boys can learn even more years, but not even have one year for their own personal growth and development.

    Try to set a better example for your daughter than whining and complaining, and blaming every one but yourself for your choices.

  48. Hey ben Torah you just gave all the reasons why a girl should go. To learn that she has much more to offeeer the world then to be stuck with a person as mean selfish and closed minded as you.

  49. Well, i heard that a terrific seminary opened up in Toronto about two years ago. My neighbors daughter went lastyear and she really loved it, the classes are amazing, and after Peseach they go to Isreal for a few weeks!! So you get the great classes and the “Isreal Experiance”.

  50. Ari lots of luck to you and your family! I couldnt agree with you more…and to all those who are just telling you to wait it out, why go through all this…I am iyh sending my daughter (gonna try to get her in) to R Assaf’s new seminary in brooklyn…heard she is gonna have a great staff, plus its gonna be fun. So maybe think in that direction for your next daughters, caus they are planning a amazing program, even better then the Isreali seminarys. A gut gebenthed yur!

  51. I agree- don’t need a year in Israel, with the enormous expense and worry just to do what everyone is supposed to. Take a trip with your daughter and experience Israel together. Then go to seminary here.

  52. I can not comment to the benefits of an education in E’Y or a seminary year of the sorts. I suspect that there is a large movement to push our children into very special schooling for better or for financial woe. If you are going to commit, you have no guarantee of course that you did the right thing and of course there are other options, but at this point, live with your decision and hope for a positive outcome. I do not think that the idea of a seminary year in Israel is a terrible thing and I am sure that there are many who have beneficial experiences. Of course, if your children are not near your home, you lose your own priviledge to educate them yourself for that time and you are basically allowing for them to seek an independant learning experience in the hands of people you may have never met or have little contact. Of course, this is the nation of our people and of course everyone has their own ideas and preferences on learning. But I do not think it would be an option I would consider with a child under say 17. Good luck.

  53. The real issue at hand here is that semenaries are businesses but ones that aren’t needed any more than banana clips, hoola hoops or pet rocks.

  54. It is obvious from the vast majority of comments, that most of you do not value Torah education for women. It is even more obvious that many of you do not value Eretz Yisrael for your daughters. By the way to the Mechanech, Most of your Mechanchim and mechanchot do not know how to learn let alone teach CHUMASH AND NACH. Most of them do not know the difference between Pshat and Drush, let alone how to teach them. By what standard are you evaluating your education or higher education for girls and women?

  55. After spending 21k for your daughter to waste a year in Israel maybe the parent’s will grow wiser and learn that they wasted 21k. Maybe for the next daughter they will be smarter.

  56. The connection between seminary and marriage is tenuos at best. With parents continuing to support their children after marriage and couples residing within travelling distance of their parents, the separation and misery of homnesickness is not the same. The shock of going from being a pampered daughter at home, sharing a room with perhaps one or two other siblings is not quite like sharing a matchbox with 6 girls.Schnorring a place to eat for Shabbos is excruciatingly humbling. I sympathize with your daughter. The peer pressure for Israeli seminary is quite excessive and out of place.

  57. consider yourself lucky – my daughter had to leave seminary after six weeks and they kept about 75% of our money. read the contracts carefully – they are stacked in favor of the schools (who craft them) in my opinion. i just wonder how people grew up frum for the first 3,500 years of jewish history without seminary.

  58. nebech. Israel doesn’t exist solely for the sake of supporting sploit kids from America. You obviously haven’t the first idea what it means to live in Israel, or that the country is not an extension of the great USA

  59. There is a new seminary opening next year in NY. Rebitzen Assaf and Bella Weinreb. They even had a haskama from R’ Kanievsky. and with there track record I could assure you its gonna be better then any seminary yet.

  60. Girls do not need “higher education”. They didn’t need it for 2,000 years, and they don’t need it now.

    The Chofetz Chaim had Sara Schneir design a basic Beis Yaakov to keep the girls away from the shmutz in the world. We don’t need more than that.

  61. To Sheldon: re comment 70. There are many people who do value girls’ education and have a passionate attachment to E”Y but are simply not financially able to. (There are other valid factors as well.) I think we are doing our children and our people a grave disservice by not having quality learning experiences in ch”l for this pivotal year. And such quality experiences ARE possible.

    Think of all the centuries when such travel was an impossible dream. Our people still developed, maintained, and PASSED ON true love for E”Y. It is still possible today….

  62. The only value in sending a girl to EY is that she is finally in her Homeland. After twelve years of inferior education (sic) at best, she will finally see that there is Jewish life and even kedushah outside of Brooklyn or Baltimore. This experience is priceless. Sorry, but in the seminaries here, her education will still be inferior. However, with a bit of luck, she will realize how she has been tricked her entire life into thinking that Eretz Yisrael is not really part of Yiddishkeit.

  63. Hey, you all don’t know the facts of this particular case. Here’s mine: I didn’t get into the sem I wanted to go to – an average of 90 doesn’t cut it. My best friends went. ALL my friends were going somewhere in Israel, I would have been the only one in NY. I went to Israel and found myself in a yucky dorm, hungry, miserable, with no family in Israel to turn to. I had been to camp, but in camp you can go swimming, sing, etc. You don’t have to learn a new language, study all day, and get used to 100 degree weather with no a/c. I ended up leaving after a month, and tons of people told me that they had a bad year in seminary and wish they had not gone or had not stayed. The answer for girls who want to spend some time in the holy land is to organize a month or two stay in Israel – summer seminary, from July after 12th grade to after the chagim. then the girls can come home and go on vacation until college starts in january.

  64. My daughter has been in EY now for about two weeks. She’s still homesick, but we warned her to expect a good few weeks of adjustment time. We explained that there will be emotional, mental, and physical adjustments, and she has to be patient.
    I figured out that my daughter’s year will cost about $22,000 total, and it’s for ten months – September through June. It comes out to a cost of $73 a day.
    How anyone can even compare 10 months at a seminary in Brooklyn or Lakewood, with 10 months of breathing Avira D’Machkim – is byond comprehension. You obviously don’t begin to understand the Kedusha and greatness of Eretz Yisroel.
    It’s a struggle every day to pay for this, and it’s well worth it.
    Finally, to Ben Torah, you are so narrow-minded, I’d be surprised if you could ever get married. Your remarks border on being racist, and I find them very offensive. You should change your moniker to Ain Li Torah!

  65. To Ben Torah (79): A few decades ago our teachers countered the who needs sem argument with a compelling thought – if someone’s going for higher secular education it is good to see just how much more depth limudei kodesh has. Among other reasons.

    Ch”l sems can easily match if not surpass Israeli sems in content of classes. I think it’s really important to recognize and encourage this, so no one feels shortchanged for her decision.

  66. well just wait it out till next year, when brooklyn is getting a real good option, “veat alies” a new seminary program…supposed to be the greatest out there yet. Mrs Assaf and Mrs Wienreb at the helm, couldnt be better…so soon not all girls will “have to go to EY”….

  67. my daughter is in a half year sem in Israel and is too busy to be homesick! this was her choice and now she gets the best of both worlds. She is in Eretz Yisroel for 5 months and then home to begin her college and career education. She looked into the American and Israel options and there are many. Toronto, Montreal, Cleveland, NY, Lakewood just to name a few besides Israel. I think the problem here is that you sent her not B’lev Maleah and she picked up on it so now she is ready to come home!!

  68. Going to Sem in Israel is all about Shidduchim! Don’t kid yourself! When a Shaddchan say’s, I have the best boy in Lakewood for the best girl in Bnos Chava, it’s atomaticly “a match made in Heaven”! Midos, today don’t mean anything! As long as the new couple can discuss Daled Chilkie Shulchan Aruch together, thats the Eikar! It’s all insane upside down world we live in! But if you have $21,000.00 + to waste, go ahead.

  69. My daughters loved R’ Assaf in camp fay-gah. I love R’ Assaf from all her hundreds of shiurim. She actually helped me out alot. My nieces are all crazy over Bella Weinreb from camp Chail Miriam. So all I can say is I am sure This new NY sem will be a Huge hit! When R’ Assaf does something she does it right, just listen to one of her speeches. Shanna Tova to all of Klal Yisroel!

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