The Truth About Relationships with Military Men

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Ah, amazing military men. The movies sure make having one by your side seem great, don’t they? Unfortunately, the various movies are actually often far from the reality of these relationships, but that definitely doesn’t mean that the potential relationship isn’t worth it. If you’re actually considering being in a relationship with an amazing military man but aren’t quite sure what to expect, this article was written for you! Read on to learn the ins & outs of relationships with military men.

Does military-related stress affect the couple in the relationship?

Of course, it does! When dating or planning to start dating or even marry a military man, ladies definitely need to recognize that this is actually a three-way relationship, not a two-way street like they’re usually used to. While the girlfriend/wife & her great man make up the majority of the relationship, the military is his mistress, and he’ll always make time for her. This can obviously be inconvenient, as the military simply runs on its own schedule: it definitely doesn’t care about civilian life! It’s always important to remember this is his job, so, unfortunately, he can’t just “skip.” Try not to actually take it personally, so when he doesn’t respond to your message or can’t show up on a date – well, it happens.

If the potential setup above actually sounds doable, then you’re probably alright to start checking out the military dating sites. However, there are definitely a few other things women seeking an army man with online dating tools might want to consider, mainly his line of work. Unfortunately, some things he actually just can’t talk about (and some he probably just doesn’t want to burden you with). Nagging him to talk will likely not end well, so just trust him. Without perfect trust, a military relationship definitely won’t last long, no matter at what stage you are – talking at an online dating service or going out actively. Also, it’s important to understand that being in the military is certainly not like having a normal job. He actually can’t just simply complain to his boss. Surely, he will definitely complain to you, but your job is just to tell him he’s doing great, not actually suggest he try to change the unchangeable.

Be prepared to be far from each other.

Unfortunately, there are many different reasons you’ll often find yourself apart from your partner. It could actually be as simple as modern-day travel bans, or (more likely) he’ll be stationed far away. You simply won’t be able to go with him when he’s training or deployed. Obviously, military success relies largely on secrecy, so it’s not that he can’t tell you where he’s going: it’s that he actually can’t. You definitely need to be comfortable with being apart for some time. It would be even easier if you met on military dating sites during his deployment, then talking online and not seeing an issue in it may become a habit to you. But unfortunately for ladies who met their partner in real-life circumstances, this relationship may actually be long-distance for some time. On the other hand, he’ll definitely give you all the attention you’ve been missing once he comes home!

If he’s actually stationed on a base, then it may be possible to live with him. However, this depends largely on the individual practices of the base he’s on. Some locations will actually allow unmarried couples to live together; others require the soldier to be married if he wants his partner to share a house on base. Unfortunately, this is obviously largely situational, so your best bet is to ask your man about the particular practices of the base he’s actually stationed at & work from there.

Understand The Reasons For His Absence

If you ever want to become part of his life, then you definitely need to understand that you’re not just making a commitment for a normal marriage: you’re becoming a military family. If you have kids together, then this actually means that a lot of the burden will fall completely on you. This definitely is inconvenient, but for a strong woman, it will actually become more & more manageable with time. 

It’s obviously not that he’s abandoning you. He simply has to go for his country. Your amazing partner made a commitment to your country & he will defend it with his life. This is truly admirable & it’s this discipline that makes military men the best partners, even if the situations you find yourself in are often inconvenient. Military men are well-traveled, well-trained, & straightforward, so you’ll definitely never have to worry about things going wrong when he’s around. That said, when he’s deployed, you’ll most likely spend nights worrying about him & hoping that he’s OK. Unfortunately, waiting is all that you can actually do. 

Being in a relationship with an amazing military man will definitely be unlike anything else you’ve ever done. It will be more stressful, more complicated, & more rewarding than any other type of relationship you can find. Ultimately, it’s up to you to decide if this is a life you’re actually willing to lead, but for the select few that can manage, the amazing positives obviously far outweigh the various negatives. Are you actually willing to give it a try?


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