By Mendy Berger
קויתי ה’ קוותה נפשי… נפשי לה’ משומרים לבוקר, שומרים לבוקר
Dovid Hamelech uses these words to describe his desire for closeness with Hashem. This sentiment was ever so present in our lives during a trip, a group of friends took to Poland. A country whose soil is saturated with centuries of Torah and tragically, with yiddishe blood. While standing in the gas chambers of Majdanik, we shared in a bond so unique. We cried so many tears of pain and sorrow for all the death and destruction around us. The history of what had happened to our people became so real, so devastating. But then another reality set in. The sacrifices of so many before us, is precisely what enabled us be there that very day.
As Yidden who are shomrei Torah Umitzvos, we are zocheh to have children fulfilling Rotzon Hashem, at a pace that has never been see before in our history. קויתי ה’ קוותה נפשי. The dawn that our grandparents davened for on the way to their deaths, is today on the verge of becoming a reality. נפשי לה’ משומרים לבוקר.When I close my eyes and picture my grandparents back then, and many others like them, I imagine these words were uttered countless times. Hoping for Hashem. Yearning for The Dawn. While it may not have been with this melody, they sang from the deepest depths of their neshamos. How lucky and thankful we must be. How incredibly humbling it is to know that we are the keepers of so many dreams and tefilos that ended in that gehenom on earth.
As we do so often in Chicago with our Chevra, we took the time to express our feelings through Niggun/Song. The final part of “קויתי” was born at that very moment and we sang this song throughout the trip. (Thank you to R Yitzi Simcha, Binyamin Shkop, and Dovid Schmelczer for spending time with me on the bus to perfect it.)
I want to thank Harav Menachem Fine (Mora D’asra of BCDE) for leading this trip, R Ari Sharf for coordinating everything, R Yechiel Spero for inspiring us constantly throughout the trip, and all my friends for allowing me the opportunity to have shared in such a memorable experience.
I also want to thank my Chevra for singing this song with me in the choir. There’s no more meaningful way of sharing this song, than with you guys.
Last but not least, I want to thank Baruch Levine for bringing out the true, raw emotion of this song. You sing it so beautifully, and you capture it’s essence perfectly.
It is my hope is that this song will conjure up the emotions that we all shared together that day in Poland; to yearn for the ultimate dawn like our grandparents and great grandparents did, and ask Hashem to bring the Ge’ula quickly, to end Klal Yisroel’s pain and suffering.
נפשי לה’ משומרים לבוקר
Composed by: Mendy Berger
Sung by: Baruch Levine
Produced By: Yochi Briskman
Choir: Mendy Berger, Nesanel Davis, Benji Israel, Levi Israel, Avrumi Prawer, R’ Yitzy Simcha, Shimmy Webster
Music Arranged by: Yitzy Spinner
Video by: JOR Productions, Chicago