This is a tough one. It was a Nisayon for your employee and a Nisayon for you. I won’t comment on the employee, but will direct my comments to you, per your request. This is what I would do:
1. Take a deep breath. Maybe 10 of them. Tell the employee you need to think about this.
2. Schedule a follow up meeting with him.
3. Schedule an appointment with your Rav. Because in today’s time, Dinai Momenus is Dinai Nefashos.
I will answer you, as a layman, not as your Rav. You asked.
It is clear to me that this employee feels insecure, ( based on his comment about NEEDING the job) and he typically straddles fences (by doing 2 jobs 50% capacity each one), wanting the job and simultaneously threatening you if he loses it.) This is his essence. At the same time, he brings a lot to the table and towards your financial success.
I would 1. respect his work productivity and 2. empathize with his emotional state. I would hope to be able to take the high road, and talk / counsel him about what lay behind his aggressive response to you. I would then suggest he learn BChavrusah Inyanei Emunah and Bitachon. A win for your business, a win for a fellow Yid.
Because- at the end of the day- if we can take our ego out of the equation, we can see so much more than insult and chutzpah. We can see the pain and anguish of the person addressing us. And our Tafkid in this world is not- earn another Million bucks- but- make your fellow Yid feel like a Million Bucks.
So -” What would Hashem want from you in this situation?” That’s the question we need to ask ourselves when faced with ego attacks. What “yenem’ thinks I should do is not significant, unless “yenem” is your Rav.
( which makes me wonder what provoked you to post this- particularly its capacity to shame him publicly- as he is not the only one in your company, and word gets around. I know you are better than that.)
Fire him immediately. Not good to have someone like that around. The threat never goes away. The longer he works the more credible he is and larger the threat. He will never be a loyal person.
I would call my lawyer to do the firing correctly.
This employee must be let go immediately!.1) no hakoras hatov for giving him the job initially. 2) you can’t be held hostage. As far as the blackmail, the truth will always prevails!
In leadership courses this is what we call a “toxic employee”. You may think the threat is to you, but keeping an employee like this in your organization will effect the performance of other employees and overall atmosphere in the company. You need to get rid of him – its not simple how do that and would take more than a comment here. The best would be to have him leave himself.
Ira, i understand you want to advertise your company and its culture but common you dont really care to listen to opinions from bunch of strangers.
If this case is true i would ask my Rav and my personal friends whos opinions i value.
Leaving Torah and halocha out of the equation, I’d speak to a lawyer just to make sure you aren’t doing anything that he could come back and sue you for, then fire him and publicize his lack of gratitude and blackmail threat as far and wide as possible, especially within your customer base and within your line of work. Document everything you can to present as proof to refute any lies he may come up with. Preemptively spread the information about what a rotten person he is, so that once he does start trying to smear you everybody will know he’s a complete liar. Do what you can to completely destroy this awful person’s reputation and ensure he can never again threaten and blackmail some other innocent as he tried to do to you.
HOWEVER…
There is no such thing as “Leaving Torah and Halocha out of the equation”. Every aspect of our lives is governed by the Torah, and Nekoma, Loshon Hora and many other potential lavin must be scrupulously avoided. As important as it is to speak to an expert in secular law, it’s even more important that You MUST speak to a rov or posek to find out what you should do, what you may do, and what you may NOT do in this case. Revenge may be sweet, but it’s assur. Please follow the halocha and may you have much hatzlocha and syata d’shmaya in your business (and especially with your future hires).
A lawyer needs to be consulted my first reaction is fire him but that might be an issue. I worked for you when you had Simple Remote and I found you to be fair and fun to work for.
You need to find out more about this person personality and upbringing
It will let you better understand his insecurities and issues.
Perhaps he is from a divorced home?
Perhaps he was raised by a very strict parent?
Perhaps he was abused as a child?
Perhaps he has major issues that are causing him great pain?
There must be much more to his story
when you know where he is coming from you will be able to understand how to address his concerns and make it a WIN/WIN
Very simple. In order for a highly productive employee to threaten their employer in this way, the person must either be ethically ignorant, have psychological problems or is severely confused. Either way, to best serve the employee and the business is to give the employee an ultimatum – middah k’neged middah. I would be blunt with the employee. I would tell the employee, “we do not make business decisions out of fear, and we don’t entertain threats from anyone. If you were not a highly productive employee, I would fire you on the spot. But, since you are a highly productive employee who I think has a bright future, I am going to give you a choice. If you agree to speak to my Rabbi about this matter, and take his advice, then I won’t fire you. But if you refuse to speak to my Rabbi and take his advice, I will fire you. Because I am a religious Jew I feel an obligation to help you before you say or do anything else that is clearly self-destructive. (If the employee is not Jewish, I would insist they get a psychological examination from a company-approved psychologist.) This approach best serves the employee and the business.
Rabbi Pink shirt,
Why are you so clearly copying John Quiñones’ What Would You Do TV show?
It looks ametourish. Time to get the TV out of the bedroom.
Keep him. Overall he seems like a good guy.
I’d do exactly what Ira did, get ahead of him by going public then fire him. Hatzlocha Ira, I hope it works!
This is a tough one. It was a Nisayon for your employee and a Nisayon for you. I won’t comment on the employee, but will direct my comments to you, per your request. This is what I would do:
1. Take a deep breath. Maybe 10 of them. Tell the employee you need to think about this.
2. Schedule a follow up meeting with him.
3. Schedule an appointment with your Rav. Because in today’s time, Dinai Momenus is Dinai Nefashos.
I will answer you, as a layman, not as your Rav. You asked.
It is clear to me that this employee feels insecure, ( based on his comment about NEEDING the job) and he typically straddles fences (by doing 2 jobs 50% capacity each one), wanting the job and simultaneously threatening you if he loses it.) This is his essence. At the same time, he brings a lot to the table and towards your financial success.
I would 1. respect his work productivity and 2. empathize with his emotional state. I would hope to be able to take the high road, and talk / counsel him about what lay behind his aggressive response to you. I would then suggest he learn BChavrusah Inyanei Emunah and Bitachon. A win for your business, a win for a fellow Yid.
Because- at the end of the day- if we can take our ego out of the equation, we can see so much more than insult and chutzpah. We can see the pain and anguish of the person addressing us. And our Tafkid in this world is not- earn another Million bucks- but- make your fellow Yid feel like a Million Bucks.
So -” What would Hashem want from you in this situation?” That’s the question we need to ask ourselves when faced with ego attacks. What “yenem’ thinks I should do is not significant, unless “yenem” is your Rav.
( which makes me wonder what provoked you to post this- particularly its capacity to shame him publicly- as he is not the only one in your company, and word gets around. I know you are better than that.)
Fire him immediately. Not good to have someone like that around. The threat never goes away. The longer he works the more credible he is and larger the threat. He will never be a loyal person.
I would call my lawyer to do the firing correctly.
This employee must be let go immediately!.1) no hakoras hatov for giving him the job initially. 2) you can’t be held hostage. As far as the blackmail, the truth will always prevails!
What on earth is this trash up here for??????
In leadership courses this is what we call a “toxic employee”. You may think the threat is to you, but keeping an employee like this in your organization will effect the performance of other employees and overall atmosphere in the company. You need to get rid of him – its not simple how do that and would take more than a comment here. The best would be to have him leave himself.
Ira, i understand you want to advertise your company and its culture but common you dont really care to listen to opinions from bunch of strangers.
If this case is true i would ask my Rav and my personal friends whos opinions i value.
My opinion, this person should be fired somehow.
Good luck
A good friend of mine always tells me “Stay away from Mishigoyim”.
Get rid of this guy as fast as you smartly can. Then refer him to a psychiatrist.
Leaving Torah and halocha out of the equation, I’d speak to a lawyer just to make sure you aren’t doing anything that he could come back and sue you for, then fire him and publicize his lack of gratitude and blackmail threat as far and wide as possible, especially within your customer base and within your line of work. Document everything you can to present as proof to refute any lies he may come up with. Preemptively spread the information about what a rotten person he is, so that once he does start trying to smear you everybody will know he’s a complete liar. Do what you can to completely destroy this awful person’s reputation and ensure he can never again threaten and blackmail some other innocent as he tried to do to you.
HOWEVER…
There is no such thing as “Leaving Torah and Halocha out of the equation”. Every aspect of our lives is governed by the Torah, and Nekoma, Loshon Hora and many other potential lavin must be scrupulously avoided. As important as it is to speak to an expert in secular law, it’s even more important that You MUST speak to a rov or posek to find out what you should do, what you may do, and what you may NOT do in this case. Revenge may be sweet, but it’s assur. Please follow the halocha and may you have much hatzlocha and syata d’shmaya in your business (and especially with your future hires).
Communicated content?
A lawyer needs to be consulted my first reaction is fire him but that might be an issue. I worked for you when you had Simple Remote and I found you to be fair and fun to work for.
The first 2 Anonymous were the best comments IMHO….
Take the high road and follow Anonymous #1 above, if that didn’t work, follow anonymous #2 and speak to a Rav…
Always follow: כבדהו וחשדהו
I need to hear both sides of the story to give a proper assessment of the situation.
H
You need to find out more about this person personality and upbringing
It will let you better understand his insecurities and issues.
Perhaps he is from a divorced home?
Perhaps he was raised by a very strict parent?
Perhaps he was abused as a child?
Perhaps he has major issues that are causing him great pain?
There must be much more to his story
when you know where he is coming from you will be able to understand how to address his concerns and make it a WIN/WIN
Very simple. In order for a highly productive employee to threaten their employer in this way, the person must either be ethically ignorant, have psychological problems or is severely confused. Either way, to best serve the employee and the business is to give the employee an ultimatum – middah k’neged middah. I would be blunt with the employee. I would tell the employee, “we do not make business decisions out of fear, and we don’t entertain threats from anyone. If you were not a highly productive employee, I would fire you on the spot. But, since you are a highly productive employee who I think has a bright future, I am going to give you a choice. If you agree to speak to my Rabbi about this matter, and take his advice, then I won’t fire you. But if you refuse to speak to my Rabbi and take his advice, I will fire you. Because I am a religious Jew I feel an obligation to help you before you say or do anything else that is clearly self-destructive. (If the employee is not Jewish, I would insist they get a psychological examination from a company-approved psychologist.) This approach best serves the employee and the business.