Watch: Shlomo Yehuda Rechnitz Highlights Plight of Girls in Shidduchim at Annual Keren Zichron Mattel Event (Videos)

Being in the field of shidduchim is time-consuming and, more often than not, thankless. Phone calls, emails, meetings, ensuring the two sides are in sync from the first date, and the myriad details that go into the making of a shidduch keep a shadchan’s plate (and inbox) full.

A decade ago, despite their hectic schedules, shadchanim R’ Meir Levi, R’ Shloime Lewenstein and R’ Tzodek Katz launched a new undertaking. From their distinct vantage point on the shidduch scene, they had become aware of an uncomfortable yet all-too-familiar scenario: A new chosson would confide in them that he lacked the basic funds to cover the costs of a decent, respectable wardrobe or to purchase the expected gifts for his kallah. The existing chasunah funds focused exclusively on assisting kallahs and their families. To fill that void, R’ Meir, R’ Shloime and R’ Tzodek founded Keren Chassanim-Zichron Mattel, named for R’ Shloime’s late mother, Mrs. Mattel Lewenstein a”h, a pillar of chesed in her community.

To ensure the highest level of discretion and sensitivity, the shadchanim set up a system wherein a needy chosson would receive vouchers to various stores, allowing him to make the necessary purchases for his chasunah. The proprietors, eager to participate in helping chassanim, generously offered steep discounts to Zichron Mattel, thus maximizing the impact of the tzedakah money.

To date, Zichron Mattel has assisted thousands of chassanim with millions of dollars in vouchers, allowing each chosson to walk down to the chupah with dignity.

Aside from seeking donations from generous donors, Zichron Mattel’s mission of helping chassanim allowed the shadchanim to tap into a unique market: bochurim in shidduchim themselves.

Rabbi Levi explained that “those who can most relate to a chosson’s needs are often his closest friends. After all, they are at the stage where they, too, are hoping to walk down the chupah soon enough. When a young couple marries, friends and family often wish the newlyweds well with a monetary gift and by pledging a percentage of their eventual maaser money to Zichron Mattel, thus ensuring that their friends, too, can get married in a respectable fashion.”

To facilitate that connection, where chassanim (and chassanim-to-be) can help their chavrusos, roommates and friends, Zichron Mattel hosts an annual bochurim’s “dinner” at the yeshiva, where bochurim have the opportunity to help their friends in a most honorable fashion.

Sunday night, in a beautiful display of nosei b’ol im chaveiro, an overflow crowd packed a specially erected tent at the corner of Seventh Street and Lakewood Avenue, down the block from Bais Medrash Govoah in the heart of Lakewood. There, they were treated to a delectable smorgasbord, graciously sponsored by various local food establishments.

R’ Yaakov Pickholtz opened the program and introduced Rav Aryeh Leib Paretzky, rosh chaburah at Bais Medrash Govoah, who delivered divrei brocha.

Then R’ Yaakov Pickholtz introduced the special guest speaker, R’ Shlomo Yehuda Rechnitz, renowned baal tzedakah and machzik Torah from Los Angeles. In introducing R’ Shlomo Yehuda, R’ Yaakov ingeniously wove in to his remarks portions of some of R’ Shlomo Yehuda’s many gorgeous musical compositions, singing a stanza before moving on to the next portion and yet another niggun. The creativity was greatly enjoyed by all.

R’ Shlomo Yehuda stepped to the podium, ready to deliver one of his classic, potent and penetrating speeches, for which he is well known. However, due to technical difficulties, the teleprompter containing R’ Shlomo Yehuda’s speech was not working. Unfazed, R’ Shlomo Yehuda good-naturedly quipped about the malfunction and spoke extemporaneously for several minutes as the technicians worked to repair the teleprompter. Once it became clear that the teleprompter would not be operable for this drasha, R’ Shlomo Yehuda masterfully delivered a speech off the cuff, sharing feelings and thoughts from his heart.

R’ Shlomo Yehuda praised the three shadchanim who founded and lead Keren Zichron Mattel, while expressing his admiration for all those present who contribute money to help those they do not know, seeking to make sure that they have what they need to celebrate the momentous time of their chasunah.

Then R’ Shlomo Yehuda spoke about a topic that is very near and dear to his heart: the plight of the many girls who have been in shidduchim for extended periods of time and have had difficulty finding a shidduch.

R’ Shlomo Yehuda asked the bochurim to show greater sensitivity to the girls in shidduchim and to consider the fact that while boys often have many shidduch options to choose from, the reality is very different for girls, so the boys should be less picky.

In addition, he pointed out that the further one moves away from what he called the “epicenter” of the Olam HaTorah in Lakewood, the harder it is for girls in shidduchim.

There was an audible gasp across the audience as R’ Shlomo Yehuda related that today, one-third of the girls in his 29-year-old daughter’s high school class remain unmarried.

Quoting from the parsha, R’ Shlomo Yehuda referred to the Torah’s description of Moshe’s first encounter with the Bnei Yisroel after leaving Paroh’s palace. The posuk states, “Moshe grew up and went out to his brothers and he saw their burdens – vayar b’sivlosam.” Rashi explains that the term “b’sivlosam” indicates more than a mere observation of their oppression by Moshe. It signifies that he didn’t maintain a distant stance. Instead, he immersed himself in their reality. Moshe not only noticed their suffering, but actively engaged with it, directing his heart to fully understand and share in their hardship.

“We don’t know the feelings on the other side,” R’ Shlomo Yehuda said referring to the girls. “If we’d know the tzaar, everybody would rethink [the situation].” He added that sometimes the pain is so much more acute for the parents of these girls.

R’ Shlomo Yehuda concluded his remarks by stating that in addition to his regular annual donation to Keren Zichron Mattel, he would be donating an additional $100,000 to this magnificent cause.

The attendees thoroughly enjoyed the evening and left feeling grateful to be part of this most unique movement, while uplifted and inspired by the powerful words of R’ Shlomo Yehuda.

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{Matzav.com}