Watch: Surprise Marriage Proposal During Havdalah

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David and Cara met on Shabbat.com, Rabbi Benzion Klatzko’s Jewish Social Network website. David called Rabbi Klatzko and asked to join for Shabbos with Cara. During livestream Havdalah, David shocked everyone by proposing.

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41 COMMENTS

  1. Getting down on on’s knees to propose is pure GOYISH!!! Also, he’s not allowed to touch her, as when he gave her the ring (did she choose it?). Confusing clip, because the Klatzkos are amaaaaaaazing.

  2. Getting down on one knee to propose comes from genuflecting, the kneeling Catholics do upon entering their houses of worship. When they enter the sanctuary and see the altar, they briefly kneel and cross themselves. It’s not something a Yid should be copying.

    • I was comparing the wonderful (extended) Klatzko family as a piece of Kedushas Ha’aretz, not (necessarily) Monsey, though Monsey has its share of special and holy Jews.

  3. There is a much greater problem which is that by giving a ring there is a shaila if this is considered Kedushen. Therefore the Lubavitcher Rebbe said that it shouldn’t be done.

    • and everybody rules according to lubavitch? not everyone follows chasidus! plenty of rabbonim to go around not just one rebba

  4. I’ve been to the Klatzko home for a Shabbos with my wife & kids, a few years ago. It was absolutely amazing to experience it first hand. The chessed that Rabbi & Rebbitzen Klatzko display and do is unbelievable. At the Friday night seuda, I counted 75 people eating there. A drop less by the morning seuda. They don’t judge ANYONE! They accept their fellow Yidden as they are. They perform hachnasas orchim to the highest level. When I retired for the evening Friday night at around 2:00am, Rabbi Klatzo was still up talking, encouraging, and being michazek a number of his guests! All his children actively participate in his tremendous hachnasas orchim each in their own way. I remember coming up the driveway & stairs and immediately one of his boys ran to us and carried my luggage up (against my protests) into the house and brought it straight to the room we would be sleeping in. Many of his guests are not-yet-Frum or in the process of learning about their heritage. Some are going thru very difficult life challenges and the Klatzko’s are an address where they can come, be accepted, encouraged, and helped.
    For those petty comments that were left above, you should apologize. What have YOU done to help your fellow Jew?!
    I wish the Klatzko’s and Shabbat.com Hatzlacha Raba in all their endeavors.

    • What do you mean by judging and by petty comments? Proper Kiruv incorporates teaching of proper Halacha, which comes from Hashem’s Torah. Is Halacha to be disregarded?

      Kneeling and proposing in public are taken from the Goyim. Even if a boy and a girl are dating, does that mean that both are at a stage to get married? What if the girl had refused in public? And what’s with all the screaming going on? Is this modest?

      The boy gave the girl a engagement ring in public in front of a room of Kosher witnesses. He should have put it down on a table in a room without Kosher witnesses and specified that it’s a gift, and then she could have picked it up; he should not have put it on her finger. If C”V this engagement breaks up later on, there may be a problem, as it may be considered as a Kidushin.

      An engaged boy and girl have only one thing between them – an agreement to get married. They are still 2 single people. They are not yet a couple. They do not become a couple until the girl goes to the Mikvah and they go under the Chupah. The girl is still Nidah and Ervah to the boy, so they cannot touch each other, and they are still not allowed to be alone together in Yichud.

      Since when is specifying proper Halacha, judgmental and petty? I

      • Where was your indignant anger when Matzav posted a video of some hatzalah member kneeling in front of an open ambulance to propose to his lady? Why were you silent then but vocal now? Now I know why you’re a bitter older single.

        • 1) I never knew about the existence of that video until you told me just now.
          2) B”H I’m married a long time.
          3) What does being single or married have to with stating the Halacha?

          • and you have no halachic quandaries of being on the internet? oh I see its easier to look in the neighbors yard.
            would you voice such a fierce campaign if this was your niece or nephew? or be happy they are marrying jews?
            but if this was instead an article about jews intermarrying. you would probably pop out of the woodworks and chime in I’m sure!

  5. I know that putting on the ring on this STRANGE girl is the equivalent to MARRYING her and is NOT THE WAY THINGS ARE DONE!

  6. Yekusial G. Amen ur 100% right. People would rather focus on one thing that was done by someone from not heimishe background instead of seeing all the great stuff going on there. People should get a good look at R’ Klatzko in this world caus in the next world he’ll be way out of reach!

    • Exactly what does this have to do with the fact that what the boy and girl did here is against the Torah’s Halacha?

        • jane doe,
          simple question what’s worse something that might be dangerous or something which is guaranteed dangerous?

          “HE USED TO SAY, A FOOLISH PIETIST etc. What is a foolish pietist like? — E.g., a woman is drowning in the river, and he says: ‘It is improper for me to look upon her and rescue her’. ” sotah 21b
          “R. Jeffrey Woolf recorded the following story about the Kovno Rav. He heard it from an eyewitness and it is very illuminating.[9]
          The pre-war Jewish community of Kovno (Kaunas, today) Lithuania was divided into different components, divided by the Neris River. On the one side was the general community, which was made up of every type of contemporary Jewish religious and cultural population. Indeed, the community was a bit notorious for a lackadaisical form of religiosity. On the other side of the Williampol bridge, was the famous Slabodka Yeshiva, a flagship of the Mussar Movement. As might be expected, relations between the two sectors were often tense. There was a saying attributed to the Alter of Slabodka, R. Nosson Zvi Finkel זצ”ל, that the bridge from Kovno to Slabodko only went one way.
          Coping with the myriad of challenges, modernization and secularization in Kovno was its illustrious rabbi, R. Avraham Dov-Bear Kahana-Shapira זצוק”ל, author of the classic collection of responsa and Talmudic essays דבר אברהם, and known more popularly as the ‘Kovner Rov.’ One central concern of his was the alienation of young Kovner Jews from the synagogue. Thus, when the administration of the Choral Synagogue came to him with an intriguing approach to the problem, he jumped at it.
          The idea was to have the synagogue’s cantor, the internationally renowned tenor Misha Alexandrovich, offer public concerts that would feature classical חזנות alongside renditions of serene Italian bel canto compositions. The hope was that this type of cultural evening would draw modernizing young Jewish men and women to the synagogue, where they would socialize and (perhaps) find mates.
          The first concert was a smashing success and more were planned. Everyone was thrilled, except for the heads of the Slabodka Yeshiva. They turned angrily to the Kovner Rov and demanded that he intervene to stop the concerts. They were indecent, the Rashe Yeshiva objected. The led to fraternization between men and women, and in the synagogue. Worse still, they might corrupt yeshiva students.
          The Kovner Rav listened quietly, and then firmly rejected the Yeshiva’s objection. “You are responsible only for your yeshiva,” he asserted. “I am responsible for the spiritual welfare of all of the Jews of Kovno.” The concerts, he declared, would continue.”
          http://seforim.blogspot.com/2012/12/a-letter-from-r-nathan-kamenetsky.html

  7. This has nothing to do with the Klatzko’s. They are unbelievable people and deserve tremendous credit!!! However- kneeling might be a major problem- period. And having this viewed on Matzav makes it worse. People have certain Heterim for what to say and what not to say when doing Kiruv. But the Heter is for THEM. And for THOSE people that are involved. So maybe they don’t have to point out every wrong if they are being Mekarev them. However for us, wrong is wrong, period. When it comes to pointing out somthing that may be wrong, all of a sudden Judaism becomes the 1st scapegoat. ” Stop Judging”. ” Where’s your Ahavas Yisroel” .”Sinai Chinam”. “So narrow minded”. ( in every other area it’s OK to judge- but just not in judaism…. STOP!) If you see someone about to give a speech and his pants are falling down, but he doesn’t know it. And he’s about to approach the podium, would u tell him?? of Course you would!! How could u not?? Unless you couldn’t care less about another person. Would he want he want to be told? Of course he would! He wouldn’t want his speech recorded with his pants falling! He would thank you to no end.
    If you care about another Yid, you want to tell him ( Obviously in a nice respectful caring way) if he’s doing something wrong. And one day they will thank you!

  8. 31 comments and no one has the courtesy of wishing the couple Mazal Tov? Derech Eretz Kadema LaTorah. By all means, argue about the halachic propriety of what was done, but at least have some Derech Eretz first.

    Mazal Tov to this new Jewish couple in Kelal Yisrael!

  9. do people put up the same opposition to schlissal challah? or mums the word when “superstitious nonsense” for parnasah is on the line!

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