Joe Biden: ‘I’ll Kill Your Son’


joe-biden1In a speech Wednesday, the vice president recalled a moment from childhood when he ‘smashed [the] head’ of local bully-and then threatened to kill him.

Vice President Joe Biden said he once chased down a bully on his bicycle, physically assaulted him, and threatened to “kill” him-all in the name of protecting the honor of his sister Valerie.

Biden is, of course, famous for being a bit loose in his public remarks. But these comments, made Wednesday night in New York City, were particularly unbound.

The vice president was being honored by Vital Voices, a women’s rights charity, at their event “celebrat[ing] men who combat violence against women.” Biden spoke about standing up for women, both in his personal and professional lives. In doing so, the vice president delighted the audience with a personal anecdote from his childhood as Joey Biden.

“I remember [one] Sunday,” Biden began. “Always the big treat was, we’d stop at the donut shop…We’d get donuts, and my dad would wait in the car. As I was coming out, my sister [Valerie] tugged on me and said, ‘That’s the boy who kicked me off my bicycle.'”

“So I went home – we only lived about a quarter mile away – and I got on my bicycle and rode back, and he was in the donut shop.”

Biden remembered the boy was in a physically vulnerable position: “leaning down on one of those slanted counters.”

Sensing his opportunity, Joey Biden pounced: “I walked up behind him and smashed his head next to the counter.”

“I’m not recommending it,” he added.

“I walked up behind him and smashed his head next to the counter.”

“His father grabbed me, and I looked at his son and said, ‘If you ever touch my sister again, I’ll come back here again and I’ll kill your son.’ Now, that was a euphemism. I thought I was really, really in trouble… My father never once raised his hand to any one of his children – never once – and I thought I was in trouble. He pulled me aside and said, ‘Joey, you shouldn’t do that, but I’m proud of you, son.'”

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  1. You can bet that this story never actually happened. It’s just one of those things that Biden does best – makes stuff up because he doesn’t really have anything factually true that is good that he can tell his audience so he has to rely on made up stuff.

  2. Uncle Joe was blessed to be born with a goldeneh foot in his mouth. He gives Chizuk to all of us that are out there roaming around. You see, even a Biden can rise up to become a hairs breath away from President of the United States.