The Matzav Shmoooze: Remember the Singles


shidduchimDear Editor@Matzav:

I just want to get a message out to your readers:

For families: As Pesach is fast approaching and the families are getting together, please remember your single sisters and brothers. While most people my age are anticipating getting together with their siblings, and going to Mommy’s hotel for a vacation, for us, it’s no vacation. The single daughter is the one who has to babysit everyone’s children, set up the tables for each meal, serve, clean up etc. All the while, all the siblings and sister/brother-in-laws are discussing their children, sheitels etc. while we sit among them, a stranger among family. Please be considerate and do not take advantage of your single siblings and lift a hand. Include us in conversations we can relate to.

For friends: As the extended families sit around the table, please ask your brothers/brother-in-laws if they know of anyone for your single friends. Have us in mind please, and try to network for your single friends.

Thank you and good yom tov!

You single sister, friend, and neighbor

{ Newscenter}


  1. Sometimes Hashem does not plan the wedding when you want it. Sometimes to serve Hashem, you have other options to try in your day before your marriage. If you pester your spirit wondering about marriage constantly, you likely wont be happy when you get there either. So relax and enjoy the ride. Trust in Torah Values.

  2. Al singles must read a new book about the “Shidduch Crisis” .et in on Amazon fo onl a few dollars. Its a best sell on the Amazon list. Its called END THE MADNESS” by Chananya Weissman.

  3. By now it is known to the Rabonim Roshai Yeshivos & Yeshiva Bocherim the reason that 10% of Bais Yakov girls remain single is because of the Age-Gap. Boys start @ 23 & girls start @ 19. It`s time to stop sending bocherim to Erets Yisroel after 21 (after they finish American Yeshivos).As long as bocherim continue not to listen to shidduchim until after they come back the aguna situation will not change. Every 10 boys going to EY & not listening to shidduchim until 23 are guilty of causing one Aguna. No one knows who will be from the 10% .So please keep the boys (over 21) in the US until they get engaged. They can go after they r engaged & get married. Start redding shidduchim to the 21 year old boys. If we can get 1000 21 year old boys & 1000 22 year old boys in shidduchim the 23 year old boys would beg for a date with the 23 (+) year old girls. Let those boys feel the pain they want to cause to 10% of the bais yakov girls. Halacha & Daas Torah is that bocherim should start shidduchim at a younger age.
    Lman Bnos Yisroel

  4. Don’t worry. This crises is only temporary. For the last five years or so we have Nasi ensuring us that the shidoch crises is being brought under control.

  5. to 7:

    Well, consider that Torah is not a maxim for your wealth acquisition but rather for improving your soul and spirit and mind and then consider that you are headed where Hashem wants you unless you deviate from your course and then might very likely have tzarros, curses and any other malady that pushes you back to your true mission, you should consider that the real reason for our lives is not procreation unless its our purpose as a Torah Student to be so endowed. Our purpose is foremost to Learn Torah. And on that need, we can all keep our eyes peeled for Hashem’s signs that we have the future in the right order.

  6. According to most matchmakers that deal with singles in our community , the girls and their parents are too picky and exclusive and their lists of demands are far longer and extensive then those of the boys. Every shadchan still considers it the biggest breakthrough and milestone in the process when they finally get the girls yes which takes far longer to get then the boys yes. When many of the girls whine about that they have no shidduch, they are whining about the three boys that they picked out that they didnt get the expected yes from. Hence ,not in all , but in many cases they and theyr parents are the creators of their own crisis. Im sorry , but this is every macthmakers experience.

    Chag sameach to one and all.

  7. #10: Your gibberish borders on kefirah. Check out the very first of the 613 mitzvos.

    And study very hard the concepts of tefillah and bechirah chofshis.

  8. it doesn’t matter why we are not married yet. the point while we are still waiting u can be very considerate to us and help us and let us join in the conversation.