Purim News Round-Up


purim Another year, another summary of the news

Just a wrap-up to read and hopefully amuse

So enjoy your m’shaloch monos from us to our friends

And imy’H the big headline this year will be “Galus Ends!”

A tragedy happened out in the Ocean Atlantic

When Captain Coward abandoned the sinking Gaavatanic

The US, embarrassed, had to call Iran on the phone

“Oh pretty please, won’t you return our drone?”

The biggest party since Shushan, redefining excess

That would be in Britain, where William found a princess

Howling winds made trees bend and houses lean

And streets flooded on account of Irene

Idealists protested by living in a smelly pigsty

“Not fair you’re rich, not me!” shouted those of Occupy

The GOP contest is all business and no game

Just ask the losers, like Perry or Cain

Speaking of fights that make the hair stand on your flesh

I hope everyone calmed down in sleepy Beit Shemesh

Few events we remember where we were and when

Such as hearing about the shooting of Osama Bin laden

Whomever is leading by the singing of the fat lady

That’s who won the Big Game- not Tom Brady

As I write this rhyme, outside it’s a beautiful day

Because this year Old Man Winter is MIA

Much hatzlocho, brocho & nachas should come your way

“Ah Freilechen Purim!” is all that’s left to say

Simchos this year, there should be lots of

Enjoy the Yom Tov! Your friends from Matzav

{Matzav.com Newscenter}


  1. And streets flooded on account of Irene. Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha! 3 Frum people died because of that flood! Ha ha ha ha! Way to go! Very funny!

  2. Cute, but unfortunately we live in a world where the writer had to leave out some of the biggest headlines because they’re inappropriate for a Torah Newssite